EP 223.5: The Day I Stopped Pretending Black Coffee Was Enough + 8 Things That Are So Much Better Than Settling for Starving **Must Listen Fav**

In this deeply personal and transformative episode, Lindsey shares a powerful message that came to her during her morning devotions: "It is possible to miss who you've been called to be because you're addicted and attached to who you've settled to be." If you've been settling for a life controlled by your eating disorder, this episode will open your eyes to the incredible life waiting for you on the other side of recovery.

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What You'll Learn:

• The powerful devotional quote that sparked this entire episode
• Why settling for your eating disorder is actually addiction in disguise
• 8 specific ways life becomes dramatically better in recovery
• The shocking statistics about eating disorders and relationships that no one talks about
• How to identify where you're settling vs. truly living
• Why your brain chooses "guaranteed misery" over uncertain freedom
• The exact moment Lindsey knew she had to stop pretending and start living

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The 8 Things Better Than Settling for Disordered Eating:

1. ENERGY ☕

• Energy to tackle today with cream in your coffee
• No more "I don't drink my calories" badge of honor
• True nourishment vs. running on empty

2. CARBS & FREEDOM 🥞

• Pancake breakfasts without guilt
• Snacks on snacks on snacks
• Being known as the "snack queen" instead of the restriction queen

3. PRESENCE WITH YOUR PEOPLE 👥

• Breaking the isolation cycle
• Showing up fully for those who matter most
• No more avoiding social situations due to food fear

4. HEALTHY HAIR & YOUTHFUL SKIN ✨

• Trading thin, brassy hair for healthy locks
• Getting your glow back through proper nourishment
• Looking younger, not older, through recovery

5. SAYING YES TO LIFE 🎉

• Ice cream with your kids just because
• Dinner with friends without menu anxiety
• Breaking rigid rules and embracing spontaneity

6. INTIMACY & CONNECTION 💕

• Restored libido and energy for relationships
• No longer too tired for life's pleasures
• 80% higher sexual satisfaction in recovery

7. CAPACITY FOR PEACE 🕊️

• Mental freedom from obsessive food thoughts
• Learning to distinguish your voice from ED voice
• Getting out of your own way

8. FREEDOM FROM METRICS 📊

• Walking without counting steps
• Grocery shopping without reading every label
• Eating dinner without pre-checking menus
• Cooking without calorie counting

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Key Takeaways:

✨ "Settling for crumbs doesn't keep you fed - it keeps you starving"

✨ "At any given second, you have the power to say 'this is not the life that I want'"

✨ "We prefer 100% certainty of something, even when it doesn't benefit us"

✨ "You're not alone and you don't have to live like this"

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Episode Highlights:

• [Opening] The devotional quote that changed everything
• [Energy Section] Why "I don't drink my calories" was a lie Lindsey told herself
• [Presence Section] How eating disorders create dangerous isolation
• [Intimacy Section] The 80% statistic about sexual health and eating disorders
• [Peace Section] Learning to distinguish your voice from your eating disorder voice
• [Certainty Effect] Why our brains choose guaranteed $30 over potential $45

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Powerful Statistics Mentioned:

• Women with eating disorders have 80% fewer sexual encounters than those without
• According to the certainty effect, people choose guaranteed lesser gains over potential greater gains
• Research shows our brains constantly search for comfort and certainty, even when it harms us

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Reflection Questions:

1. Where are you settling in your life right now?
2. Are you living or just surviving?
3. What would you tell your best friend if she shared your settling list with you?
4. Are you missing who you've been called to be because you're attached to who you've settled to be?

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Action Steps:

1. Make your settling list - Write down all the areas where you're settling for less
2. Respond with compassion - Answer as if advising your best friend
3. Choose one area to stop settling in today
4. Take radical responsibility for the life you want to create

Rate & Review:

If this episode resonated with your athletic experience and gave you hope that freedom is possible, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Your review helps other former athletes find the specialized support they need to reclaim their lives.

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xo,

lindsey

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* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.