6 days ago

EP 221.5: Which Recovery Phase Are You In? The 10-Stage Roadmap Every Woman in Recovery Needs **Must Listen Fav**

In this essential episode, Lindsey breaks down the 10 distinct phases of eating disorder recovery, drawing from Carolyn Costin's research while adding her own spiritual and practical insights. From the initial denial phase of "I don't think I have a problem" all the way to complete recovery, this roadmap helps you identify exactly where you are in your journey and what comes next. If you've ever felt confused about your progress or wondered if you're "doing recovery right," this episode provides the clarity you've been searching for.

The 10 Phases of Recovery (Quick Reference)

Phase 1: "I don't think I have a problem" - Complete denial, "this is just who I am"

Phase 2: "I might have a problem, but it's not that bad" - The "I'm fine" and "not sick enough" phase

Phase 3: "I have a problem but I don't care" - Awareness without motivation to change

Phase 4: "I want to change but don't know how and I'm terrified" - The breakthrough moment

Phase 5: "I tried to change but couldn't" - Previous attempts didn't work, feeling hopeless

Phase 6: "I can stop some behaviors but not all" - Partial progress, selective recovery

Phase 7: "I can stop behaviors but thoughts remain" - Actions changing, mindset lagging

Phase 8: "Often free from behaviors and thoughts, but something feels missing" - The spiritual component gap

Phase 9: "Free from behaviors and thoughts, surrendered control" - Nearly complete freedom

Phase 10: "I am recovered" - 6+ months of complete freedom, helping others

Key Insights You'll Gain

On Recovery Reality (4:00-5:00) "The secret to recovery isn't forgetting the pain existed or diminishing the damage that occurred. It's allowing it to be there, but that pain and damage no longer controls and defines every ounce of who you are."

On Getting Stuck in Phases (18:00-19:00) "We can get trapped in wanting recovery to go perfectly, that we stay in one of these phases too long because we're not sure that we've mastered it yet. Every single day is an opportunity to grow and move forward."

On the Missing Ingredient (13:00-15:00) "There's gonna be days where your promise to yourself, your commitment to yourself is just not enough... There's gonna be days where you need a higher motivator."

On Progress Over Perfection "These different phases of recovery are all about progression over perfection. You don't have to master each phase - you just have to keep moving through them."

Why This Framework Changes Everything

  • Eliminates confusion about where you are in recovery
  • Normalizes the non-linear nature of healing
  • Provides hope when you feel stuck or lost
  • Identifies specific support needs for each phase
  • Prevents perfectionist paralysis in recovery
  • Highlights the importance of spiritual/soul work in lasting freedom

Perfect for Women Who:

  • Feel confused about their recovery progress
  • Wonder if they're "doing recovery right"
  • Have tried recovery before and want to understand what went wrong
  • Are considering getting professional help but aren't sure they're "ready"
  • Want to understand the long-term recovery journey
  • Need hope that complete freedom is actually possible
  • Are supporting someone else in recovery

Throughout this episode, Lindsey weaves in her own experience spending extended time in various phases, particularly Phase 3 ("I have a problem but I don't care") and Phase 8 (feeling like something was missing until she incorporated spiritual surrender). Her vulnerability about getting stuck and her insights about the soul component of recovery make this more than just clinical information.

Ready to Move to Your Next Phase?

If you're in Phases 4-5 (wanting change but scared or having tried before), this is the perfect time to get personalized support. Lindsey specializes in meeting women exactly where they are and creating a path forward that honors your unique situation and fears.

Apply for coaching: www.herbestself.co/services

  • Personalized recovery roadmap based on your current phase
  • Support through the scary transitions between phases
  • Tools to accelerate your progress without perfectionist paralysis
  • Spiritual integration if that resonates with your journey

Connect & Continue Your Journey

If This Replay Helped You

Please rate, review, and share this episode. Many women have told us this single episode provided the clarity that shifted their entire recovery journey. Your review helps more women discover this roadmap when they're feeling lost and confused about their progress.

Tag a friend who needs to hear this framework - sometimes knowing exactly where you are is the first step to moving forward.


Remember: You don't repeat what you repair. Identifying your phase isn't about judgment - it's about empowerment. Every phase serves a purpose, and every phase leads to the next when you're ready to move forward.

Your recovery is possible. Your freedom is waiting. And now you know exactly where you are on the path to get there.

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