Her Best Self | Eating Disorder Recovery Podcast, Disordered Eating, Anorexia, Bulimia, Orthorexia, Body Image, Food Freedom, Calorie Counting, Obsessive Exercise, Food Restriction

EP 225.5: Reflection from My 2007 Journal - Here's The #1 Truth No One Talks About in Eating Disorder Recovery **Must Listen Fav!**

In this raw and vulnerable episode, Lindsay shares the one truth about eating disorder recovery that no one wants to discuss: it gets harder before it gets easier. She opens up her personal recovery journal from 2007 to give you an unfiltered look at what the healing journey really looks like.
If you're struggling with disordered eating or an eating disorder, this episode will prepare you for the reality of recovery while giving you the encouragement to keep fighting for your freedom.
What You'll Learn
The #1 thing about eating disorder recovery that no one talks about
Why your eating disorder voice gets louder when you start healing
What to expect during the "stuck" phase of recovery
How to push through when recovery feels impossible
Why zero women who've recovered live with regret
The difference between existing and truly living your life
Key Takeaways
"If it's hard, it's working. If it's hard, it's worth it."
"Things tend to scream before they die." - Your eating disorder will fight harder as you get stronger
"Maybe life isn't about avoiding the bruises. Maybe life is actually about collecting the scars to prove that you showed up for it."
Raw Recovery Journal Entry
Lindsey reads from her November 13, 2007 journal entry, revealing her internal struggle with:
Trying to restrict while knowing it's harmful
Feeling guilty for even thinking about food rules
The exhaustion of analyzing every meal and calorie
The confusion between hunger and forced eating
The obsession with control and letting go
Resources Mentioned
Her Best Self Society: www.herbestselfesociety.com 
One-on-One Recovery Coaching: Limited slots available at www.herbestself.co
Connect with Lindsey
Ready to start your recovery journey? Lindsey has two one-on-one coaching slots available. Fill out the client application at herbestself.co to discuss what personalized recovery support looks like for you.
Love This Episode?
If this episode resonated with you:
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Episode Quotes
"The world isn't gonna stop for your unhealthy relationship with food. People are going to still experience life - the beauty, the fear, the joy of it all - and maybe you'll be 40 or 50 or 30 or 60 or 89 and you will have just existed. Is that what you want?"
"While it may be painful for a while, you are a conqueror, you are a warrior. Hold on one more second, one more day."
"The hard is temporary and what you experience on the other side of recovery - that my friend, that's permanent."
Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological treatment. If you're struggling with an eating disorder, please seek help from qualified healthcare professionals.

EP 225: Why 91% of Women Diet to Belong + 3 Revolutionary Strategies to End the Cycle This Week⛓️‍💥

If you're a high-achieving woman who has built an empire of accomplishments but still feels like an outsider looking in, this episode will revolutionize everything you thought you knew about your relationship with food and your body.
Today we're exposing the truth behind the staggering statistic that 91% of women diet to belong, and why your weight obsession is actually a belonging crisis in disguise. You'll discover the research-backed connection between restriction and worthiness, learn why your "disciplined" identity is actually a prison, and walk away with 4 revolutionary strategies to reclaim your power this summer.
This isn't just another episode about food freedom—this is your call to revolution.
What You'll Discover
✨ Why 91% of women use dieting as a belonging strategy (and why it backfires)✨ The Harvard research that proves relationships matter 10x more than weight for happiness✨ How your "disciplined identity" around food is actually keeping you small✨ Why validation addiction through restriction is sabotaging your authentic connections✨ The revolutionary truth about weight, worth, and belonging that changes everything✨ 3 power practices you can implement this week to break free from the cycle
Shocking Statistics Revealed
The Belonging Crisis Numbers
91% of women surveyed on college campuses had attempted to control their weight through dieting
22% of women diet "often" or "always" (National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders)
95% of people struggling with food restriction report feeling "different" or "misunderstood" (Center for Mindful Eating)
The Research That Changes Everything
Harvard's Study of Adult Development: Quality of relationships determines happiness and health more than any other factor—not dress size, not workout routine
95% of diets fail long-term, yet women continue the cycle of restriction
85% of eating disorders start as "normal" dieting behavior
Key Revelations
The Belonging Wound
Your obsession with weight has nothing to do with your weight and everything to do with your wounded belief that you don't belong. You've convinced yourself that belonging is conditional—requiring the right size, perfect discipline, most controlled relationship with food.
The Identity Prison
You've made restriction your religion and your body your altar. The identity keeping you "safe" from rejection is the same identity keeping you small. When you define yourself as "the disciplined one," you're not building strength—you're building a prison with bars made of other people's opinions.
The Validation Addiction
Every compliment about your discipline gives you a temporary hit, but validation addiction works like any other addiction—the highs get shorter and the lows get deeper. You need more external approval to feel momentarily worthy.
Powerful Quotes to Remember
"True belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world." - Brené Brown
"The belonging you're seeking through their approval will never be sustainable because it's not real. Real belonging comes from the inside out, not the outside in."
Your Belonging Revolution Toolkit: 3 Power Practices
Practice 1: The Belonging Mirror Method
Every morning before checking your phone, stand in front of your mirror and say: "I belong here. In this body, in this life, in this world. Not because of what I weigh, but because of who I am." Then name three things you're grateful your body can do. This rewires your brain from criticism to celebration.
Practice 2: The Summer Freedom Food Challenge
This week, choose one food you've been restricting and eat it mindfully in a social setting. Maybe it's ice cream on a date, bread at dinner with friends. The goal isn't the food—it's practicing belonging while nourishing yourself. Notice how no one cares what you're eating as much as you think they do.
Practice 3: The Energy Reclaim Ritual
Instead of over-exercising to earn belonging, move your body in ways that make you feel powerful. Dance in your living room. Walk in nature. Stretch on your porch. Ask: "How does my body want to move today?" then honor that answer. Transform movement from obligation to celebration.
Bonus Practice: The Validation Redirect
When you catch yourself seeking approval about food choices, body, or discipline—pause and ask: "What validation do I need to give myself right now?" Then give it to yourself. Out loud. With conviction.
The Summer Revolution Challenge
This summer, stage a revolution for your body, not against it. For freedom, not restriction. For your soul, not your size.
Ask Yourself:
What would it look like to show up to summer gatherings as the woman who belongs because she's claimed it through courage?
What would it feel like to order what you want because you want it, not because you've "earned" it?
What would it mean to wear the swimsuit because you realize your body was always perfect for living your life?
Research Sources
Brené Brown's belonging and vulnerability research
Harvard Study of Adult Development (relationships and happiness correlation)
National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders (dieting statistics)
Center for Mindful Eating (restriction and social connection studies)
Ready for Your Revolution?
If this episode lit a fire in your soul and you're ready to stop earning worth through restriction and start claiming power through presence, it's time to take action.
The belonging you're seeking isn't hiding in a smaller dress size or waiting at your goal weight. It's available right now, in this body, in this moment, as you are.
Take the Next Step: Fill out a client application at www.herbestself.co to learn about my Breakthrough Experience and Freedom Formula programs. We don't just heal your relationship with food—we revolutionize your relationship with your worth.
Your revolution starts now. Let's break the chains together.
Connect With Lindsey
🎙️ Website: www.herbestself.co 📱 Instagram: @thelindseynichol💌 Email: info@herbestself.com👥 Private Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Share the Revolution
If this episode revolutionized your perspective on belonging and worthiness, please:
✨ Leave a 5-star review - Your words help this message reach more women who need to hear it✨ Share with a friend - Tag someone who needs permission to stop earning their worth
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

EP 224: "I Don't Eat Carbs" & Other Lies You're Believing + 3 Strategies to Break Free from Fear Foods This Summer

If you're the woman everyone sees as "having it all together" but you secretly battle food thoughts every day, this episode is for you. Today we're exposing the lies high-achieving women tell themselves about carbs and revealing why your fear of bread, pasta, and fruit has nothing to do with discipline and everything to do with identity.
You'll discover the science behind why your brain needs carbohydrates to function, hear a powerful client transformation story, and walk away with 3 tangible strategies you can implement this week to start eating freely this summer.
What You'll Learn
✨ Why your identity as "the disciplined one" might actually be keeping you trapped✨ The scientific truth about carbs and brain function that diet culture doesn't want you to know✨ How restriction is literally impacting your cognitive performance and mood✨ Why the most successful women struggle most with food freedom✨ 3 immediate action steps to break free from carb fear this summer
Key Takeaways
The Identity Trap
Your fear of carbs isn't really about carbs—it's about who you think you'll become if you eat them
Being "the woman who doesn't need carbs" has become a prison disguised as discipline
True discipline looks like nourishing your body, not restricting it
The Science You Need to Know
Your brain uses 120 grams of glucose daily (480 calories worth of carbohydrates)
Glucose is the primary fuel source for your prefrontal cortex (decision-making center)
Low-carb diets can impair cognitive performance and mood regulation
Carbs are essential for serotonin production (your happiness neurotransmitter)
The Summer Shift
This summer can be different, but it requires challenging the identity you've built around restriction and embracing a new definition of what it means to be disciplined and successful.
3 Strategies to Break Free From Fear Foods This Summer
Strategy 1: The Summer Food Dare
Choose one carb you've been avoiding and eat it mindfully this week. Notice how your body feels and remind yourself: "I am safe. I am nourished. I am worthy of enjoyment."
Strategy 2: The Identity Reframe Journal Practice
Every morning write: "I am a woman who nourishes herself well." List what you WILL eat to fuel your life instead of what you WON'T eat.
Strategy 3: The Carb Curiosity Experiment
For one week, approach carbs with curiosity instead of fear. When the voice says "you don't need that," respond with "I'm curious how this will make me feel."
Featured Client Story
Hear how Lindsey's client, a doctor by trade and marathon runner, went from being unable to eat a bagel without spiraling to enjoying pizza with her kids and pasta on date nights—while actually improving her energy and work performance.
Research Mentioned
American Journal of Clinical Nutrition: Brain glucose requirements
Journal of Nutrition: Cognitive performance and carb intake
MIT Research: Carbohydrates and serotonin synthesis
International Journal of Eating Disorders: Flexible vs. rigid eating patterns
Quotes to Remember
"Your fear of carbs isn't about the carbs—it's about losing control of an identity built on restriction."
"The only bad thing about carbs is the people who tell you not to eat them."
"Your brain runs on glucose, not willpower."
"You don't earn carbs. You deserve them because you're alive."
Ready to Go Deeper?
If this episode hit you right in the chest and you're ready to break free from food fear this summer, you don't have to do this alone.
Take the Next Step: Fill out a client application at www.herbestself.co to learn about partnering with Lindsey through her Breakthrough Experience or Freedom Formula programs. These aren't quick fixes—they're deep identity work that helps you become the woman who eats freely while living fully.
Your future self—the one eating pasta at sunset dinners and ice cream with your kids—is waiting for you to take the first step.
Connect With Lindsey
🎙️ Website: www.herbestself.co 📱 Instagram: @thelindseynichol💌 Email: info@herbestself.com👥 Private Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Leave a Review
If this episode resonated with you, I'd be so grateful if you'd leave a rating and review. Your words help this podcast reach more women who need to hear that food freedom is possible.
Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear that she's worthy of nourishment and that breaking free from food rules is the most disciplined thing she can do.
xo,
Lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

EP 223.5: The Day I Stopped Pretending Black Coffee Was Enough + 8 Things That Are So Much Better Than Settling for Starving **Must Listen Fav**

In this deeply personal and transformative episode, Lindsey shares a powerful message that came to her during her morning devotions: "It is possible to miss who you've been called to be because you're addicted and attached to who you've settled to be." If you've been settling for a life controlled by your eating disorder, this episode will open your eyes to the incredible life waiting for you on the other side of recovery.
What You'll Learn:
The powerful devotional quote that sparked this entire episode
Why settling for your eating disorder is actually addiction in disguise
8 specific ways life becomes dramatically better in recovery
The shocking statistics about eating disorders and relationships that no one talks about
How to identify where you're settling vs. truly living
Why your brain chooses "guaranteed misery" over uncertain freedom
The exact moment Lindsey knew she had to stop pretending and start living
The 8 Things Better Than Settling for Disordered Eating:
1. ENERGY ☕
Energy to tackle today with cream in your coffee
No more "I don't drink my calories" badge of honor
True nourishment vs. running on empty
2. CARBS & FREEDOM 🥞
Pancake breakfasts without guilt
Snacks on snacks on snacks
Being known as the "snack queen" instead of the restriction queen
3. PRESENCE WITH YOUR PEOPLE 👥
Breaking the isolation cycle
Showing up fully for those who matter most
No more avoiding social situations due to food fear
4. HEALTHY HAIR & YOUTHFUL SKIN ✨
Trading thin, brassy hair for healthy locks
Getting your glow back through proper nourishment
Looking younger, not older, through recovery
5. SAYING YES TO LIFE 🎉
Ice cream with your kids just because
Dinner with friends without menu anxiety
Breaking rigid rules and embracing spontaneity
6. INTIMACY & CONNECTION 💕
Restored libido and energy for relationships
No longer too tired for life's pleasures
80% higher sexual satisfaction in recovery
7. CAPACITY FOR PEACE 🕊️
Mental freedom from obsessive food thoughts
Learning to distinguish your voice from ED voice
Getting out of your own way
8. FREEDOM FROM METRICS 📊
Walking without counting steps
Grocery shopping without reading every label
Eating dinner without pre-checking menus
Cooking without calorie counting
Key Takeaways:
✨ "Settling for crumbs doesn't keep you fed - it keeps you starving"
✨ "At any given second, you have the power to say 'this is not the life that I want'"
✨ "We prefer 100% certainty of something, even when it doesn't benefit us"
✨ "You're not alone and you don't have to live like this"
Episode Highlights:
[Opening] The devotional quote that changed everything
[Energy Section] Why "I don't drink my calories" was a lie Lindsey told herself
[Presence Section] How eating disorders create dangerous isolation
[Intimacy Section] The 80% statistic about sexual health and eating disorders
[Peace Section] Learning to distinguish your voice from your eating disorder voice
[Certainty Effect] Why our brains choose guaranteed $30 over potential $45
Powerful Statistics Mentioned:
Women with eating disorders have 80% fewer sexual encounters than those without
According to the certainty effect, people choose guaranteed lesser gains over potential greater gains
Research shows our brains constantly search for comfort and certainty, even when it harms us
Reflection Questions:
Where are you settling in your life right now?
Are you living or just surviving?
What would you tell your best friend if she shared your settling list with you?
Are you missing who you've been called to be because you're attached to who you've settled to be?
Action Steps:
Make your settling list - Write down all the areas where you're settling for less
Respond with compassion - Answer as if advising your best friend
Choose one area to stop settling in today
Take radical responsibility for the life you want to create
Rate & Review:
If this episode resonated with your athletic experience and gave you hope that freedom is possible, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Your review helps other former athletes find the specialized support they need to reclaim their lives.
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

EP 223: Former Athletes & Eating Disorders ~ Why Freedom Feels Impossible (Until Now) + Your Competitive Edge Solution

In this powerful episode, Lindsey breaks down why former athletes face unique challenges in eating disorder recovery that go far beyond what most people understand. If you're a former athlete struggling with an eating disorder and wondering why freedom feels so impossible, this episode will finally give you the answers you've been searching for - plus a roadmap to use your competitive edge as your greatest recovery asset.
What You'll Learn:
The shocking statistics about eating disorders in former athletes that no one talks about
Why your athletic training is actually making your eating disorder stronger (and how to reverse this)
The 4 specific reasons freedom feels impossible when you have an athletic background
How your perfectionism became your eating disorder's best friend (and worst enemy)
The strength misconception that's keeping you trapped in restriction
Why asking for help feels like admitting weakness (and why that's actually your eating disorder talking)
How to turn your competitive edge into your recovery superpower
The ultimate game plan for athletic-minded recovery
Key Takeaways:
✨ "You're not failing at recovery. You're just applying the wrong strategy."
✨ "Your eating disorder isn't your perfectionism. Your eating disorder is a counterfeit version of perfectionism."
✨ "The strongest thing you can do is feel scared about gaining weight and eat the meal anyway because you value your freedom more than your fear."
✨ "Breaking free from an eating disorder requires more mental toughness than any sport you've ever played."
Episode Highlights:
[1:30] The International Skating Company moment that changed everything
[4:30] Why former athletes are 60% less likely to seek treatment
[7:00] The perfectionist's paradox in eating disorder recovery
[9:00] What real strength looks like vs. what your ED tells you
[11:00] How to compete against your eating disorder instead of other women
[12:30] Your step-by-step game plan for freedom
Powerful Statistics Mentioned:
Athletes are 2-3 times more likely to develop eating disorders than non-athletes
Former athletes are 60% less likely to seek treatment for eating disorders
89% of elite athletes score high on perfectionism scales vs. 32% of general population
78% of former athletes fear recovery will make them "soft" or "undisciplined"
Athletes who reframe competitive drive toward recovery have 73% higher success rates
Action Steps:
Redefine strength - Strength isn't restriction, it's resilience
Reframe your competition - You're competing against your ED, not other women
Apply athletic goal-setting to recovery milestones
Embrace the training mindset - expect good days and challenging days
Stop trying to recover perfectly - aim for freedom, not perfection
Resources Mentioned:
Best Self Breakthrough Program - Apply at www.herbestself.co/services
National Eating Disorders Association statistics
Journal of Clinical Sport Psychology research
Stanford University eating disorder studies
Perfect For:
Former competitive athletes struggling with eating disorders
High-achievers who feel like they "should be able to handle this alone"
Women whose perfectionism feels like both their biggest asset and biggest problem
Anyone who's been told they're "too disciplined" to have an eating disorder
Former athletes afraid that recovery will make them weak or undisciplined
About the Host:
Lindsey Nichol is an eating disorder recovery coach, former professional figure skater, and founder of Her Best Self Co. After her own journey from elite athletic performance to eating disorder struggle to complete freedom, she now specializes in helping former athletes and high-achieving women break free from eating disorders using strategic, results-driven approaches. She understands the unique challenges former athletes face because she's lived them.
Rate & Review:
If this episode resonated with your athletic experience and gave you hope that freedom is possible, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Your review helps other former athletes find the specialized support they need to reclaim their lives.
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

EP 222: Terrified to Gain Weight This Summer? Here's Your Sign & Personal Invitation to Take Radical Responsibility✨

In this no-holds-barred episode, Lindsey shares the shocking moment that forced her to stop making excuses and take radical responsibility for her eating disorder recovery. If you're terrified of gaining weight this summer and tired of blaming everyone except yourself, this episode will give you the wake-up call you need to reclaim your power and choose freedom.
What You'll Learn:
The life-changing moment when Lindsey had her "come to Jesus" wake-up call
Why playing victim keeps you stuck in your eating disorder cycle
The hard truth about who's really responsible for your recovery (spoiler: it's you)
How to stop blaming external factors and start making empowering choices
Why "radical responsibility" is the key to breakthrough in recovery
Specific action steps to take control of your recovery journey today
Key Takeaways:
✨ "Your eating disorder is not happening TO you. It's happening BECAUSE of choices you're making every single day."
✨ "Either get help or don't. But stop pretending this is okay."
✨ "You will never feel ready. There will never be a perfect time. You will always have excuses available to you."
✨ "Recovered women don't wait for perfect timing. They take action despite the fear."
Episode Highlights:
[02:30] The shower incident that changed everything
[05:15] How I blamed everyone except myself for my eating disorder
[08:45] The victim mentality that keeps you stuck
[11:20] What radical responsibility actually looks like
[13:10] The choice you have to make today
Resources Mentioned:
Best Self Breakthrough Summer Intensive - Apply at Her Best Self Co. here: Client Application
National Eating Disorders Association recovery statistics
Her Best Self Society Facebook Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Action Steps:
Stop the blame game - Write down who/what you've been blaming for your eating disorder
Take radical responsibility - Admit where you're choosing your ED over recovery
Make one different choice today - Even if it's scary, even if you don't feel ready
Apply for the Best Self Breakthrough - If you're ready to stop making excuses
Connect with Lindsey:
Website: www.herbestself.co 
Email: lindsey@herbestself.co
About the Host:
Lindsey Nichol is an eating disorder recovery coach, former competitive figure skater, and the founder of Her Best Self Co. After her own journey from restriction and perfectionism to freedom, she now helps women break the chains of their eating disorders and step into their best lives. She's passionate about helping high-achieving women realize that recovery is possible - even when they're terrified to gain weight.
Rate & Review:
If this episode gave you the breakthrough you needed, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Your review helps other women find the support they need to start their own recovery journey.
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

EP 221.5: Which Recovery Phase Are You In? The 10-Stage Roadmap Every Woman in Recovery Needs **Must Listen Fav**

In this essential episode, Lindsey breaks down the 10 distinct phases of eating disorder recovery, drawing from Carolyn Costin's research while adding her own spiritual and practical insights. From the initial denial phase of "I don't think I have a problem" all the way to complete recovery, this roadmap helps you identify exactly where you are in your journey and what comes next. If you've ever felt confused about your progress or wondered if you're "doing recovery right," this episode provides the clarity you've been searching for.
The 10 Phases of Recovery (Quick Reference)
Phase 1: "I don't think I have a problem" - Complete denial, "this is just who I am"
Phase 2: "I might have a problem, but it's not that bad" - The "I'm fine" and "not sick enough" phase
Phase 3: "I have a problem but I don't care" - Awareness without motivation to change
Phase 4: "I want to change but don't know how and I'm terrified" - The breakthrough moment
Phase 5: "I tried to change but couldn't" - Previous attempts didn't work, feeling hopeless
Phase 6: "I can stop some behaviors but not all" - Partial progress, selective recovery
Phase 7: "I can stop behaviors but thoughts remain" - Actions changing, mindset lagging
Phase 8: "Often free from behaviors and thoughts, but something feels missing" - The spiritual component gap
Phase 9: "Free from behaviors and thoughts, surrendered control" - Nearly complete freedom
Phase 10: "I am recovered" - 6+ months of complete freedom, helping others
Key Insights You'll Gain
On Recovery Reality (4:00-5:00) "The secret to recovery isn't forgetting the pain existed or diminishing the damage that occurred. It's allowing it to be there, but that pain and damage no longer controls and defines every ounce of who you are."
On Getting Stuck in Phases (18:00-19:00) "We can get trapped in wanting recovery to go perfectly, that we stay in one of these phases too long because we're not sure that we've mastered it yet. Every single day is an opportunity to grow and move forward."
On the Missing Ingredient (13:00-15:00) "There's gonna be days where your promise to yourself, your commitment to yourself is just not enough... There's gonna be days where you need a higher motivator."
On Progress Over Perfection "These different phases of recovery are all about progression over perfection. You don't have to master each phase - you just have to keep moving through them."
Why This Framework Changes Everything
Eliminates confusion about where you are in recovery
Normalizes the non-linear nature of healing
Provides hope when you feel stuck or lost
Identifies specific support needs for each phase
Prevents perfectionist paralysis in recovery
Highlights the importance of spiritual/soul work in lasting freedom
Perfect for Women Who:
Feel confused about their recovery progress
Wonder if they're "doing recovery right"
Have tried recovery before and want to understand what went wrong
Are considering getting professional help but aren't sure they're "ready"
Want to understand the long-term recovery journey
Need hope that complete freedom is actually possible
Are supporting someone else in recovery
Throughout this episode, Lindsey weaves in her own experience spending extended time in various phases, particularly Phase 3 ("I have a problem but I don't care") and Phase 8 (feeling like something was missing until she incorporated spiritual surrender). Her vulnerability about getting stuck and her insights about the soul component of recovery make this more than just clinical information.
Ready to Move to Your Next Phase?
If you're in Phases 4-5 (wanting change but scared or having tried before), this is the perfect time to get personalized support. Lindsey specializes in meeting women exactly where they are and creating a path forward that honors your unique situation and fears.
Apply for coaching: www.herbestself.co/services
Personalized recovery roadmap based on your current phase
Support through the scary transitions between phases
Tools to accelerate your progress without perfectionist paralysis
Spiritual integration if that resonates with your journey
Connect & Continue Your Journey
Her Best Self Society: Join our private Facebook community at www.herbestselfsociety.com
Instagram: @thelindseynichol
Website: www.herbestself.co 
If This Replay Helped You
Please rate, review, and share this episode. Many women have told us this single episode provided the clarity that shifted their entire recovery journey. Your review helps more women discover this roadmap when they're feeling lost and confused about their progress.
Tag a friend who needs to hear this framework - sometimes knowing exactly where you are is the first step to moving forward.
Remember: You don't repeat what you repair. Identifying your phase isn't about judgment - it's about empowerment. Every phase serves a purpose, and every phase leads to the next when you're ready to move forward.
Your recovery is possible. Your freedom is waiting. And now you know exactly where you are on the path to get there.

EP 221: Present Over Perfect ~ How Food Obsession Steals Your Life (& 4 Strategies to Get It Back)

In this powerful episode, Lindsey explores how eating disorders and food obsession act as "time thieves" and "energy vampires," stealing your presence from the moments and people that matter most. She shares the life-changing realization that when we don't sacrifice for what we ultimately want, we become the ultimate sacrifice - and our relationships pay the price.
Key Takeaways
🎯 The Real Cost of Food Obsession
Eating disorders aren't just about food - they're mental energy drains that steal your presence from your own life
The constant mental chatter about food planning, guilt, and rules exhausts you before your day even begins
Your pursuit of food perfection is sacrificing your ability to be fully present with the people you love
💡 The Sacrifice Revelation "If you don't sacrifice for what you ultimately want, then you become the ultimate sacrifice."
What you ultimately want: Connection, presence, energy for what matters, peace of mind
What's actually being sacrificed: Time with your spouse, conversations with your kids, your ability to be fully present in your own life
🔄 The Present Over Perfect Shift Your family doesn't need a perfect you - they need a present you. Stop waiting to be worthy of love when you "figure out" the food thing. You're worth loving right now, struggles and all.
4 Practical Strategies to Reclaim Your Presence
Strategy #1: The 3-Second Check-In
Throughout your day, pause and ask: "Where is my mind right now?"
If caught in food thoughts during important moments, simply notice without judgment
Ask: "What would it look like to be fully here right now?"
Strategy #2: The Energy Audit
Track for one day how often you catch yourself in food-related thoughts
Make a mark on your phone each time you're planning, worrying, calculating, or obsessing about food
Count them at day's end - this is how much life force is being redirected from what matters
Strategy #3: The Presence Practice
Choose one meal/snack daily to eat with complete presence
Put phone away, don't plan next meal, ignore calorie counting
Focus on taste, texture, satisfaction - practice being fully there
Strategy #4: The Connection Redirect
When spiraling into food thoughts, immediately reach out to someone you love
Text your teenager, call your spouse, hug your pet
Redirect mental energy toward connection instead of obsession
Real-Life Application: The Dinner Table Revolution
Make dinner time device-free AND food-rule-free for your mind:
No mental calorie counting or meal planning during family time
Ask about everyone's day and really listen
Share something about your day unrelated to food
Practice being completely present with your family
This Week's Homework
Choose one person in your life and commit to being fully present with them for at least 10 minutes every day:
Morning coffee with your spouse
After-school time with your child
Phone call with a friend or family member
No phone, no food thoughts, no mental planning - just you, fully there
Episode Quotes
"Every moment you spend obsessing about food is a moment you're not fully living your life."
"Your kids don't need a perfect mom. Your spouse doesn't need a perfect partner. They need YOU. Present, engaged, fully there YOU."
"You are not your thoughts about food. You are a woman with purpose, with love to give, with a life that's happening right now."
Resources & Next Steps
Join Our Community
Her Best Self Society - Our private community where women support each other in choosing present over perfect every day.
Stay Connected
Visit www.herbestself.co to join our email list and be the first to know about upcoming events and services.
Remember
Stop sacrificing your presence for the pursuit of perfection. Your people need you here. Your life needs you here. You deserve to be fully present for your own beautiful, imperfect, real life.
If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. Together, we're choosing presence over perfection, one moment at a time.
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
______
Email me directly -> lindsey@herbestself.co
______
Join the free FB community -> www.herbestselfsociety.com
______Need a helping hand guiding you girl!? You don’t have to do this alone!Step 1: Go all IN! Decide to commit to yourself & your future! Do it scared girlfriend. Just do it!
Step 2: Apply for limited 1:1 & let’s work together -> Client Application
Step 3: Leverage the FB community for support & stay tuned for all the resources up & coming to help serve you!YOU TOTALLY GOT THIS!
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

EP 220: The #1 Phrase That is Toxic to Your Best Self + The Decision-Making Framework That Actually Works

Are you stuck in the cycle of starting and stopping recovery? Always "trying" but never fully committing? In this game-changing episode, Lindsey reveals how one simple phrase is sabotaging your progress and keeping you trapped in what she calls "decision defaulting." Learn the neuroscience behind why "I'm trying" programs your brain for failure, and discover the powerful mindset shift that transforms chronic restarters into recovery success stories. If you're tired of living in the "maybe someday" space and ready to make decisions that stick, this episode will revolutionize your approach to healing.
What You'll Learn in This Episode
The psychology behind "decision defaulting" and why your brain prefers it
How the phrase "I'm trying" creates neural pathways for partial commitment
The difference between illusion of control vs. real personal power
Specific language shifts that activate "implementation intention"
Why your eating disorder wants you to stay in "trying" mode
A concrete challenge to break the decision defaulting cycle this week
How to know when you're ready for professional support vs. continued self-help
Key Moments & Timestamps
Opening CTA for Consultation (0:30-2:00) Lindsey speaks directly to chronic restarters and those hesitant to start recovery
What is Decision Defaulting? (2:00-5:00) "'Trying' is just a socially acceptable way of avoiding responsibility for your choices."
Client Story: Emma's 3-Year Trying Cycle (3:30-4:30) How one client's language shift changed everything in recovery
The Neuroscience of Decision Defaulting (5:00-8:30) Why undernourished brains default to tentative language and how trauma responses play a role
From Trying to Deciding: The Power Shift (8:30-12:00) Specific examples of language that creates commitment vs. escape routes
Your Decision-Making Challenge (12:00-14:00) Two concrete options to practice decisive action this week
Powerful Quotes from This Episode
On Decision Defaulting: "Decision defaulting is when you avoid making definitive choices because not deciding feels safer than deciding 'wrong.'"
On the Trying Trap: "When you say 'I'm trying,' you're leaving yourself an escape route. You're keeping one foot out the door. You're protecting yourself from the vulnerability of full commitment."
On Neural Pathways: "Every time you make a definitive choice and follow through, you strengthen the neural pathways associated with self-efficacy and personal agency. Every time you default on a decision, you reinforce the pathways associated with helplessness."
On Eating Disorder Strategy: "Your eating disorder wants you to keep 'trying.' It wants you to stay in that wishy-washy space where you're sort of committed but not really. Because as long as you're just trying, you're not a real threat to its control over your life."
On Real Power: "The power isn't in making perfect decisions. The power is in making decisions and sticking with them long enough to see what happens."
Language Shifts That Change Everything
Instead of: "I'm trying to eat regular meals"Decide: "I'm deciding to eat breakfast at 8am, lunch at 1pm, and dinner at 6pm, regardless of how I feel about it"
Instead of: "I'm trying to be less active"Decide: "I'm deciding to take three complete rest days this week and limit exercise to 30 minutes on active days"
Instead of: "I'm trying to stop weighing myself"Decide: "I'm deciding to remove the scale from my house and ask my roommate to hide it"
Instead of: "I'm thinking about getting help"Decide: "I'm deciding to schedule consultation calls with three recovery coaches this week"
This Week's Decision Challenge
Option 1: The Immediate Action Decision Choose ONE thing you've been "trying" to do in recovery and make a definitive decision about it today. Write it down: "I am deciding to _______." Take one concrete action within 24 hours.
Option 2: The Support Decision If you've been "thinking about" getting help, either decide you're going to take action and schedule consultations or decide you're not ready and stop the maybe-someday torture.
Scientific Research Referenced
Dr. Carol Dweck's studies on language and behavior creating neural pathways
Dr. Peter Gollwitzer's research on implementation intentions (2-3x more likely to follow through)
Dr. Kristin Neff's research on self-compassion and decision-making fear
Ready to Stop Decision Defaulting?
Free Consultation with Lindsey If you're ready to stop the cycle of starting and stopping recovery, or finally take that first real step into healing, Lindsey is offering complimentary consultation calls.
During your call, you'll get clarity on:
Where you are vs. where you want to be in recovery
What kind of support would best serve your specific situation
Whether working together makes sense for your journey
Your next right step forward (with no pressure or obligation)
Schedule your call: www.herbestself.co Lindsey personally responds to every application within 48 hours
Connect With Lindsey
Instagram: @thelindseynichol
Website: www.herbestself.co 
Email: info@lindseynichol.com
If This Episode Hit Home
Please rate, review, and subscribe to the Her Best Self podcast. Your support helps more women discover that they have the power to stop "trying" and start deciding their way to freedom.
Share this episode with someone who's been stuck in the "trying" cycle - they need to hear that their power lives in their decisions, not their intentions.
Remember: You are not broken. You are not weak. You are just ready to stop defaulting and start deciding. Your future self is waiting for you to choose her over your eating disorder, your dreams over your fears, your healing over your habits.
 
 
 

EP 219: The Body Story That's Keeping You Trapped with Poor Body Image (+ How to Change It & Write Your Next Chapter!)

In this episode, Lindsey speaks directly to the exhausted high-achieving woman, who's spent decades restricting food and over-exercising while trying to lead in every area of life. Drawing from her personal recovery from anorexia and years of coaching experience, Lindsey helps you understand how your "body story" - those deep-rooted messages about what your body should look like and what it means about your worth - was written by diet culture, not by you. Learn how to identify the costly messages you've been carrying and discover a framework for rewriting your relationship with your body from shame to self-compassion.
What You'll Learn in This Episode
How to identify the specific cultural messages that shaped your relationship with your body
The hidden costs of carrying shame-based body stories (energy, presence, relationships, dreams)
Why your body became a "project to control" rather than a "home to inhabit"
The difference between health and size (and why conflating them keeps you trapped)
A practical framework for rewriting your body story starting this week
Specific daily practices to shift from body criticism to body appreciation
Key Moments & Timestamps
Opening (0:30-2:00) Lindsey speaks directly to exhausted high-achievers ready to break the restrict-exercise cycle
The Body Story Begins (2:00-5:00) "When did you first learn that your body was a problem to be solved? You didn't start out hating your body. You learned to."
Cultural Messages That Shaped You (5:00-8:00)
"Good girls don't take up too much space"
"Your body is your responsibility to control"
"Thin equals healthy, healthy equals worthy"
"Successful women have it all together, including their bodies"
The True Cost of Body Shame (8:00-10:30) What carrying these stories has cost you in energy, presence, authentic self, health, relationships, and dreams
Rewriting Your New Story (10:30-13:30) "Your body is not a problem to be solved. It's a miracle to be appreciated."
Powerful Quotes from This Episode
On Learning Body Shame: "You didn't start out hating your body. You learned to. You learned from a culture that profits from your insecurity."
On the Prison of Control: "That same control that felt like freedom was actually building your prison, brick by brick, year by year."
On Exhaustion: "You're successful in every other area of your life. You lead teams, you manage budgets, you solve complex problems... But when it comes to your body, you still feel like that confused young girl who learned that her worth was tied to her weight."
On True Health: "True health includes your mental well-being, your energy levels, your ability to do the things you love, your hormonal balance, your sleep quality, your stress management. None of these things require you to be a certain weight or size."
On Taking Up Space: "As a leader, as a woman, as a human being - you are allowed to have needs, to have desires, to exist fully in your body without apologizing for it."
This Week's Body Story Rewrite Actions
Morning Body Appreciation: Thank your body for something it did for you yesterday instead of immediately focusing on what you don't like
Intuitive Nourishment: Ask "What would feel good and nourishing right now?" instead of "What should I eat according to my rules?"
Joyful Movement: Choose movement based on how you want to feel, not calories you want to burn
Compassionate Self-Talk: When you catch body criticism, ask "Would I talk to my best friend this way?"
Your New Body Story Framework
Old Story: "My body is a problem to be solved through restriction and exercise" New Story: "My body is a miracle to be appreciated and cared for with compassion"
Old Story: "My worth depends on my size and what I eat" New Story: "My worth exists because I exist - my body is the vehicle for my life, not the determiner of my value"
Old Story: "I must control my body to be successful" New Story: "I honor my body's wisdom and treat it as I would treat a dear friend's body"
Ready for Personalized Support?
One-on-One Coaching with Lindsey If you're a high-achieving woman ready to break free from the restrict-exercise cycle and rewrite your body story with expert guidance, apply for Lindsey's coaching program at www.herbestself.co 
This intensive program is specifically designed for women who:
Are exhausted from decades of fighting their bodies
Lead successfully in other areas but struggle with food and body image
Want to reclaim the energy they're spending on food rules and exercise obsession
Are ready to model body peace for their families and teams
Connect & Continue Your Journey
Join Our Community
Her Best Self Society Facebook Group: Connect with hundreds of women rewriting their body stories www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Email List: Sign up at www.herbestself.co for exclusive resources, workshops, and offers for women breaking free from diet culture
Follow Lindsay
Instagram: @thelindseynichol
Website: www.herbestself.co 
Email: info@lindseynichol.com
If This Episode Resonated With You
Please rate, review, and subscribe to the Her Best Self podcast. Your support helps more women discover that they have the power to rewrite their body stories from shame to self-compassion.
Share this episode with a woman who needs to hear that her body story doesn't have to end with restriction and exhaustion - the best chapters are yet to come.
Remember: You are not too much, you are not too little, you are exactly enough, exactly as you are. Your body story is still being written, and you get to hold the pen.
xo,
lindsey
Coach with Me -＞Client Application
______
Email me directly -> lindsey@herbestself.co
______
Join the free FB community -> www.herbestselfsociety.com
______Need a helping hand guiding you girl!? You don’t have to do this alone!Step 1: Go all IN! Decide to commit to yourself & your future! Do it scared girlfriend. Just do it!
Step 2: Apply for limited 1:1 & let’s work together -> Client Application
Step 3: Leverage the FB community for support & stay tuned for all the resources up & coming to help serve you!YOU TOTALLY GOT THIS!
* While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.