Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol | Eating Disorder Recovery Podcast — Less Food Noise. More Life.

Sis, today we're talking about escaping excessive exercise — because rest is required in recovery.
If you never miss a Monday… if you work out every single day… if you alter your vacations around getting a workout in… if you carry insane guilt and punish yourself later when you miss one… if you skip social plans to exercise, or your routine is affecting your marriage and your family… if you restrict your food on the days you move less —
this episode is yours.
I've been exactly where you are, and I'm proof you can lay this down. My clients are proof. And sis, you can be proof too.
Why this happens (and why it's not your fault)
This is so common for women struggling with disordered eating. Why? Because you've learned to cut corners. Cut calories. Take away. Survive on less in every way possible. You've manipulated your food to do it — and you've manipulated your body and your movement to do it, too.
I didn't start out working out twice a day. I didn't start out doing compulsive movements on my bedroom floor just to burn a little more. None of it happened overnight. The disorder built it over time while I ran on fumes.
I was a cardio queen who genuinely believed she loved that life. Letting it go was one of the hardest parts of my recovery — and what saved me was discovering movement that had nothing to do with burning anything. Mindful meditation. Yoga. Experiencing my body for the first time without a calorie counter attached.
And I've watched a client go from 7 days a week at nearly two hours a day… to 3 days a week at 30 minutes. If that feels impossible to you right now, stay with me.
5 steps to release excessive exercise
1. Get real with your current routine.Write it out. How much, how often, how long? Then write out the feelings — what comes up when you don't get a workout in? What's the anxiety like around when you'll fit it in? What rises up in you at the mere suggestion of cutting back? Awareness has to come before change.
2. Understand the power of permission.You must grant yourself permission — with exercise and with food. So much of the panic around cutting back is really about permission you've never given yourself. What you give your mind power over is what will have power over you. Voice the permission out loud: "I've run my body ragged for years, and I can choose to live differently."
3. Picture your future recovered self.How much does she exercise? Does she really want to be on a treadmill every single day — or is she at brunch with her family? For me, the honest answer was: I want to meditate. I want yoga. I want to relax. Some days I want to do nothing at all. Ask yourself honestly: is my current routine enjoyable, or is it an obligation driven by fear? (And be ready — there's an identity shift in this one. "I'm just someone who loves the gym" was a badge of honor for me until I got honest about it.)
4. Pick one tangible, small goal.Get off the treadmill five minutes early. Replace Monday's workout with journal time. Then actually put your rest days on the calendar — society tells you to pen in your gym time, so do the reverse and pen in your rest. Planning in advance sets positive intent, which builds momentum, which gets you the result.
5. Progress, not perfection.If you decide in advance to rest and then catch yourself scheming a workout anyway — that's not failure, sis. That's awareness. That's growth. You're going against diet culture and beliefs you've held as truth for years. Give yourself grace.
It's okay to not work out today
It's okay to rest if…
Your body is telling you to slow down
You're trying something new with your time
Life is overrun with work, family, and obligations
You're sick
You're not nourishing your body enough
You're hurting or injured
You're struggling with body image today
You're making time to fill your own cup or chase a dream
True happiness is making peace with what's no longer serving you — and creating a healthier version of it.
A few lines from the episode
"Rest is required in recovery. It's a non-negotiable."
"What you give your mind power over is what will have power over you."
"None of it happened overnight — the disorder built it over time while I ran on fumes."
"This workout isn't going to matter in five years. It isn't going to matter in two weeks."
"That's not failure — that's growth, awareness, evolving, learning."
"If you're listening to me right now on the treadmill… get off of it. This is your permission."
Your permission slip this week
Choose the days you're not going to work out — and put them on the calendar like an appointment. Then pick something purposeful to fill that time: a coffee date with someone you love, a phone call, a journal session, or absolutely nothing at all.
There's no right or wrong way to do this. Gradual works. Cold turkey works. What matters is honoring yourself and your body.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

On the pod today, we're discussing a question from a sweet listener who wrote in and asked:
"I know in order to find peace with food and fully embrace recovery, I must increase my food intake and my portion sizes. However, I'm truly anxious and scared every time I think about this. How do I stick with it and make it a habit that builds momentum?"
Sis, I adore this question — because I have been right there. If you're terrified to even think about increasing your portions, or you feel like you're already at capacity, I want you to know: you are right where you need to be listening to today's episode.
It's okay to be afraid — you're about to do something brave
We've been programmed by a culture where less is more. Dressing on the side. Don't drink your calories. You don't need those carbs. Everything is elimination, elimination, elimination.
So of course it feels scary to go the other direction. When my dietitian first handed me my meal plan, I looked at it and thought, there is no way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks. Every fear flooded in.
But here's the truth: it's okay to be afraid, because you're about to do something that is going to bring you future joy. This takes courage. And your future self is looking back at the you sitting here right now saying, "Yes, girl. You're going to rock this recovery thing."
Step 1: Understand your resistance
When you think about adding more to your day, what actually comes up? Fear of weight gain? Anxiety that you'll lose control and never stop? A flood of old rules — when would I fit that in, what would I choose, I can't have this if I have that?
That's just your brain spinning. See yourself in that place without judgment — because the resistance shows up precisely when you're about to embark on something amazing. It's okay to be scared and still do the dang thing.
Fear is what keeps the cycle going: heaviness → restriction → overwhelm → shame → right back where you started. The way out is building new dominant pathways in your mind — and that starts with what you practice on repeat.
Step 2: Know the truth about nourishment
Don't just tolerate the idea that eating more is "better" — coach yourself on why. Adequate nutrition supports healing for your organs, your muscles, your skin, your hair. It fuels the basics — breathing, circulation, digestion. It regulates hormones that directly impact your mood and health. It armors up your immune system and protects your bones for the long haul.
This isn't about shame for lost time, sis. It's about the reframe: "This is what I'm doing for my future self, because my body deserves this level of healing."
And swap the mindset: instead of more food = weight gain, try "I'm finally supporting my body's natural regulation. My body is learning to trust me, and I'm learning to trust it." Food is medicine. It's a non-negotiable — stop making it optional.
Step 3: Practical ways to gently increase
Work with a dietitian. I'll say it plainly: I'm a certified health coach, not a dietitian — and the single best move for portions and meal planning is a professional who specializes in this. They can help with visual aids, adequate-meal guidance, and the "plate distortion" that makes it hard to even know what a normal portion looks like. If you don't have one yet, finding one is worth it.
Go gradual and small. Don't overhaul every meal at once. Pick one small, consistent addition and honor it — then build week after week. Small steps compound.
Make it a game. Can I add a little more of this? A little something extra there? Each tiny win proves to your mind that you're capable — and that empowered feeling builds real momentum.
Add variety. If your meals or meal times are rigid, gently challenge it. Try a different lunch. Add something new in a gap in your day. What's one thing you could commit to this week?
Create a mindful eating environment. Eat where you feel safe, supported, and connected — not rushed, watched, or on the go. Set healthy boundaries where you need them.
Get accountability. Tell a loved one your plan for tonight and ask them to hold you to it. Or let someone you trust support you at mealtimes. This is also exactly what a coach is for.
A few lines from the episode
"It's okay to be afraid, because you're about to do something that is going to bring you future joy."
"Fear will keep you stuck in the cycle. Courage — small, gradual courage — breaks it."
"My body is learning to trust me, and I'm learning to trust it."
"Food is medicine. Stop making it optional."
"It's okay to not be feeling it — and it's still okay to do it."
Your one thing this week
Decide on your increase. Ask yourself: "What is the one thing I'm going to choose that will prove to myself that I'm capable?" Then go do it — gradually, small, and committed. Ask "how can I care for my body today?" and follow through.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Today's episode is about one word, sis. One tiny, three-letter word that is quietly deciding the direction of your entire recovery — and honestly, your entire life.
"I want freedom, BUT I'm terrified." "I want to recover, BUT I've tried everything." "I want peace with food, BUT I don't trust myself."
Sound familiar? That little word BUT is doing more damage than you realize — and today I'm handing you the one-word swap that changes everything. Grab your Tarjay journal, girl. This one's a game changer.
BUT is a fixed mind
Here's what the word BUT actually does: it erases everything that came before it.
"I want freedom, BUT I'm scared." Do you hear it? The want just got deleted. The fear got the final word. BUT is a full stop dressed up as a sentence — it takes your desire and slams the door on it.
BUT is the fixed mind talking. It says these two things can't exist together: if I'm scared, I can't move. If I've struggled before, I can't succeed now. If it's hard, it must not be for me.
I lived in BUT for years. I want to get better, BUT this is just who I am. Every BUT was a brick in the wall between me and my freedom.
AND is a growth mind
Now watch what happens with one swap: "I want freedom, AND I'm scared."
Both things get to be true. The fear doesn't erase the want. The want doesn't require the fear to disappear first. They walk together.
AND is the growth mind: I can be terrified AND take the next step. I can have doubts AND keep going. I can have a history of struggle AND a future of freedom.
This is how courageous women actually move — not by waiting for the fear to leave, but by letting the fear ride in the backseat while the want drives. Not one woman who ever got free stopped being scared first. They just stopped letting BUT have the last word.
You can't choose both — choose one
Coach Lindsey coming in hot, because I love you too much not to: you cannot live in BUT and AND at the same time. One kills the want; one carries it.
So the next level of your life — the recovered you, the free you, the fully-present-at-the-dinner-table you — is asking you one question: what does this next level require from me?
It starts here: choose your word. BUT or AND. Fixed or growth. The wall or the door. You're already choosing one, a hundred times a day, in the tiny sentences inside your head. Today, choose it on purpose.
The longest walk you'll ever take
My business mentor and coach James Wedmore says something that has never left me:
"The greatest distance we will ever walk is between our head and our heart."
And whew — is that the truth in recovery. Because your head already knows. You've listened to the podcasts, read the books — you could teach a class on what recovery requires. Knowledge isn't your problem, sis.
The walk is from knowing it up here… to believing it in here. From "recovery is possible" as information to "recovery is possible FOR ME" as truth.
And what carries you on that walk isn't more information — it's AND. Every time you say "I'm scared AND I'm doing it anyway," you take one more step from your head toward your heart. Every meal chosen in fear, every rest taken in doubt, every hand raised for help before you feel ready — those are the footsteps. That's the walk.
Try it on
Take your sentence — you know the one — and swap the word:
"I want to be free, BUT I've had this for decades" → "I want to be free, AND I've had this for decades — so I know exactly how much this freedom is worth."
"I want to trust myself, BUT I've broken promises to myself before" → "I want to trust myself, AND I'm learning to keep promises to myself, one at a time."
Feel the difference? BUT ends the story. AND continues it. And sis — your story is not finished.
A few lines from the episode
"BUT is a full stop dressed up as a sentence."
"The fear doesn't erase the want. They walk together."
"Not one woman who ever got free stopped being scared first. She just stopped letting BUT have the last word."
"The greatest distance we will ever walk is between our head and our heart." — James Wedmore
"BUT is the wall. AND is the door."
"I want this, AND I'm scared, AND I'm going anyway."
Your homework this week
Catch your BUTs. Every time you hear one in your head — I want this, BUT… — pause and swap it out loud: I want this, AND.
Then take your biggest BUT sentence, write it in your journal, and rewrite it with AND. Watch what it opens.
'I want support, BUT…' — girl, swap it
"I want support, AND I'm scared, AND I'm reaching out anyway." That's the move. And that's exactly what we do together!
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Hey girl — if you're in the thick of a hard season right now, this one is for you.
If you're exhausted from fighting the same thoughts every single day… if you're so tired of trying to do this whole recovery thing by yourself… if you're scared to death of letting go of control but you know you desperately want to stop carrying this burden alone — I created today's episode just for you, sis.
We're doing something a little different: seashells, ocean currents, and the imagery of my happy place. But don't let the beach vibes fool you — this is one of the most important truths I've ever shared on this show. Because you are closer to shore than you think.
Picture this with me:
You're standing at the ocean. Way off in the distance is a beautiful, peaceful shoreline — that's your recovery. Your freedom. Your life without the constant mental chatter.
But between you and that shore is a massive current pushing against you. Every stroke toward healing, the eating disorder voice pushes back. That current is made of everything that feels impossible right now: the fear of weight gain, the voice saying you can't have that yet, the terror of losing the thing that's made you feel safe even while it's been destroying you, and the sheer exhaustion of fighting every single day.
And somewhere in the middle of it, you get tired. You start thinking, maybe I should just stop swimming.
Here's what I need you to know: every single woman who has found freedom from an eating disorder has had to swim against this same current. And you are stronger than the current trying to take you under.
__________________
My son spent our beach trip hunting for the "perfect" shells to bring me — the smooth ones, the whole ones, no holes, no rough edges. And it hit me: we were looking at it all wrong.
The pressure, the tumbling, the tossing — that's exactly what creates a shell's strength and its beauty. Every line and curve comes from surviving another storm. And here's the part that gives me chills: after all the chaos, the shells wash up complete. Children collect them. People treasure them. They become symbols of the ocean's power to create beauty from something that got tossed around and slammed to the ground.
The broken ones tell a story. And nobody actually wants the "perfect" ones anyway — those are the little baby shells that have never been in the deep waters.
Sis, this is your story. Every hard day, every moment you choose your meal over your fear, every time you resist the scale — you're forming another layer of strength. You're not broken because you're in the storm. You're in the process of becoming a treasure.
_______________
I know what you're thinking: "I'm terrified of letting go. What if I lose control?"
Truth bomb, sis: you're not actually in control right now anyway. Your eating disorder is controlling when you eat, what you eat, how much you exercise, what you wear, where you go, your thoughts from the moment you wake until you sleep. That's not control — that's a false sense of safety that's keeping you fighting the current. Or worse, drowning in it.
And stepping into faith? I'm not talking about a giant leap where you suddenly trust everything perfectly. I'm talking about one stroke toward shore instead of treading water in the same spot:
Eating your snack when the voice says you don't need it
Choosing rest when your body is exhausted
Reaching out for support instead of figuring it out alone
Trusting that putting yourself first isn't selfish — it's necessary
Even the strongest swimmers need a lifeguard
I know you. You're the woman who thinks she has to do everything herself — believe me, I am her. You've been managing your recovery, your food, your kids, your husband, your whole life all by yourself, and beating yourself up when you get tired.
But here's the hardest truth: the hardest thing isn't doing it perfectly. The hardest thing is admitting you can't do it alone.
Your eating disorder has been stealing the oxygen from your lungs. Putting yourself first means finally putting on the oxygen tank. And when you do — when you stop treading alone — something beautiful happens: you become the calm in somebody else's storm. Every woman who finds freedom becomes a lighthouse for the women still fighting the current. Your daughter watches how you talk about your body. Your friends see how you handle stress. Your healing creates a ripple effect far beyond you.
A few lines from the episode
"You are stronger than the current that is trying to take you under."
"The broken shells aren't broken at all — they tell a story."
"That's not control — that's a false sense of safety."
"Faith looks like one stroke toward shore instead of treading water in the same spot."
"Even the strongest swimmers need a lifeguard."
"Recovery isn't selfish. It's wise."
"Every woman who finds freedom becomes a lighthouse for the women still fighting the current."
"You are not too far out in the current. You are not the exception to healing."
Stop swimming in circles. Stop treading water. Reach your hand up for the lifeguard — not tomorrow, not next week, not when you feel ready. Now.
Because when you get support, the current doesn't disappear — but you're not fighting it alone. The waves don't stop coming — but you learn to ride them like a surfer instead of being crushed by them.
Ready to stop swimming alone?
If this message inspired you, don't wait until you're "ready." Head to www.herbestself.co and fill out a client application — I would be honored to be the one swimming next to you, helping you navigate the waves I've already been through.
💬 Share your thoughts on this episode in our private community at www.herbestselfsociety.com or email me at info@lindseynichol.com
🎧 If this spoke to your heart, share it with a woman who needs it — and leave a rating and review so more women can find the hope and support they deserve.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Sis, I'm coming at you with some serious tough love today, because I'm about to call you out on the story you've been telling yourself about your journey.
If you've been walking around asking "Why me? Why do I have to deal with this? Why do I even bother trying to recover?" — this episode is your wake-up call. Because I'm about to flip that victim script and hand you the question that changes everything.
I just got off a coaching call with a client who's stepping into a whole new identity away from the eating disorder voice, and it lit a fire in me. So buckle up, grab your  journal, and get ready to shift from poor me thinking to powerful me living in the next 15 minutes.
The story:
You wake up and the first thought in your head is about food, your body, your weight. You spend your days calculating, restricting, obsessing — then beating yourself up for all of it. And somewhere in that mental chaos, the questions start:
Why me? Why can't I just eat normally like everyone else? What if I'm the exception? What if I'm just too far gone?
Here's the truth I need you to hear loud and clear: you are writing yourself as the victim in your own life story — and then getting mad that you're playing the victim role. You're taking clips from your journey — the hard days, the setbacks, the fears — and making them mean you're doomed.
But your thinking is driving your entire life. So let me ask you, girl… how's that working out for you?
The facts:
60–70% of people with eating disorders make a full recovery (National Eating Disorder Association)
With proper treatment, recovery rates can reach as high as 80% (Journal of Clinical Medicine)
People who believe in their ability to recover are significantly more likely to achieve full recovery — and women who reframe their eating disorder as something they're overcoming rather than something they have show better outcomes
The majority of women struggling with exactly what you're struggling with right now? They get better. They don't just manage symptoms — they become free.
So here's my question: if most women recover… why not you?
What "why me?" is really doing for you
Here's the uncomfortable truth: that question isn't really about seeking understanding. It's about staying comfortable in an identity that keeps you feeling safe.
When you ask "why me?" you get to stay stuck without taking responsibility. You get to avoid the scary. You get to keep the mask on that the eating disorder thrives off of.
I'm not judging you — I asked every one of those questions myself. "My eating disorder is different. I've had it longer. It's more severe. I've tried everything." Sis, I said all of it. And every single woman I've ever worked with thought she was the exception too.
You know what happened when they stopped playing the victim in their own story? They became the hero.
As 1 Corinthians 10:13 says: "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind." Your struggle isn't unique. Your pain isn't special. And your recovery isn't just possible — it's probable.
Same facts, different story
The facts of your life don't change. But the story you tell about them? That's 100% your choice.
"I have an eating disorder" → could mean I'm ready to heal
"Recovery is hard" → could mean I'm doing something brave
"I'm scared of gaining weight" → could mean I'm about to break through my biggest fear
Right now, your default identity is "the woman with the eating disorder." Every morning your brain boots up like a computer running that operating system — so of course the disordered thoughts come first. That's your default setting.
But what if you changed the default to recovery warrior?
A recovery warrior doesn't ask "why me?" She asks "why not me?" She doesn't say "I can't do this." She says "I'm doing this." She doesn't make herself the victim of her story. She makes herself the hero.
As Romans 8:37 reminds you: you are more than a conqueror.
Decide in advance
Here's the real truth: when I went through my recovery, I wasn't ready. I didn't raise my hand one day feeling prepared. I had to decide I wasn't going to do this to myself anymore.
So decide in advance that you're going to recover. Not I hope — but I get to. Not maybe — but I will.
Your homework: Write this down today — "I am a woman who is recovering, and recovery is my new identity in this season." And every morning when your brain boots into default mode, interrupt the pattern: "That's not who I am anymore. I'm a warrior now — and recovery warriors don't think like that."
When you change your thoughts, you change your identity. When you change your identity, you change your story — and the entire direction of your life. Maybe even a generational change in your family.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You're not broken. You're not too far gone. You're not the exception to the statistics."
"The women who recover aren't special, stronger, or smarter than you. They just decided."
"Stop making yourself the exception and start making yourself the example."
"Your eating disorder has had you for years — it doesn't get to have your future."
"You are one decision away from changing your entire life trajectory."
"Keep choosing recovery one decision at a time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
🎧 Loved this energy? Go back and listen to Episode 48: The Victory Is Yours, Sis — six choices you can make today to move from victim mentality to victor. It's one of the most-listened-to episodes on the show and pairs perfectly with today's message.
Ready to stop making yourself the exception?
You can absolutely binge this show and apply everything on your own — and I'm sending you all the vibes if you do. But if you keep finding yourself a little forward, a little backward, stuck with the same results… that's because rewriting your story alone is hard. Accountability changes everything.
I specialize in helping women just like you stop making themselves the exception and start making themselves the example. My clients don't just manage their eating disorders — they transform their relationship with food, body, their people, and most importantly, themselves.
👤 Fill out a client application at www.herbestself.co  — I'd love to personally help you shift from why me energy to why not me energy.
💬 Join the conversation in our private community at www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

No outline today, sis. No steps, no framework. Just me, fresh off our annual family beach vacation in the Outer Banks, riffing on what I noticed while I was there — and what it means for you.
Because here's the thing: the beach used to be a trigger for me. Months of restriction and doubled-down exercise before "bikini season." Fake permission at vacation dinners that never turned into real permission. Coming home to restrict and repeat the cycle all over again.
This year? I sat on the beach fully present. I played in the sand. I watched my son on his boogie board. I ate the ice cream — the salted caramel gelato with all the drizzle — without thinking twice. I had pizza with my husband. I didn't work out once. And I didn't have a single thought about my worth.
If you're in Struggleville right now believing this is just who you are and how it's always going to be — this episode is your proof that it's not.
Freedom is when something that used to scare you doesn't scare you anymore. And if I can get here, so can you.
What this episode holds
The honest before. What beach trips used to look like for me: the pre-vacation restriction, the "permission" that never came, the post-vacation punishment cycle. If you're living that loop right now, you're not alone — and it's not forever.
The striking after. What this year felt like: present, spontaneous (well — more spontaneous, I'm still a structured girl), fully there with my boys. No comparing bodies. No planning how to "burn it off." No anxiety-driven chaos before the trip. Just… vacation.
How I actually got here. Not overnight. Not with a magic ticket that somebody else has and you don't. With tiny steps of permission, intention, and consistent small actions over time that led to big results. It started way before the beach — and your version starts wherever you are today.
The reflection from the waves. Sitting on the deck listening to the ocean, I thought about how the God of the universe made every single wave different — and wondered why I'd ever spent years doubting whether He made me well. Did I ever really know better than He did?
The question I wish someone had asked me. How much longer do you plan to hang out here? Time passes either way. Recovering is the hardest thing I've ever done — but staying sick was harder.
A few lines from the episode
"Freedom is when something that used to scare you doesn't scare you anymore."
"I'm just a couple steps ahead of you, girl. I'm not better than you. If I can get here, so can you."
"You cannot measure your progress if you haven't truly gone all in on yourself."
"There is nothing you will ever lose if you are constantly gaining experience."
"Your willingness to fail in life is proportionate to your potential to gain and grow."
"Don't believe the lie that this is how it's always going to be. If you believe that lie, then it is."
"The fear is not going to dissolve. You have to face it and run anyway. Run messy, run trembling, run half certain — but run toward the life that keeps calling your name."
"Recovering is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. But what was harder was staying sick."
Your reflection this week
My challenge from the deck chair to you:
Look back, not just forward. Instead of fixating on the far-off vision of "fully recovered," ask yourself: what's one step forward where, six months from now, I could look back and know I've moved? Freedom is built out of those steps.
Check your consistency. Are you remaining consistent with small actions over time that lead to different results — or waiting to feel ready?
Sit with the big question: How much longer do you plan to hang out in Struggleville? I'm not asking with shame — I'm asking with love, because I lived there too.
Stop waiting for permission. You only get one life. Just one. What's one hard thing you can go do today?
Ready for more support?
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

A client said something recently that tore me into pieces: "I realized I've been so consumed with thinking about my next meal or obsessing over what I can and can't eat that I totally missed my son's baseball season. I was physically there but mentally checked out. I was somewhere else entirely."
If that hits you in the gut, this episode is for you.
Today we're talking about the energy thief no one names: food obsession. Because eating disorders aren't just about food — they're time thieves. They steal your presence from your own life. And your life, friend, is real and beautiful and messy, and it's happening right now, whether you're there for it or not.
In this episode, I walk you through the honest question that changes everything — how much of your day is spent thinking about food? — and gives you four practical strategies to reclaim that mental energy and come back to the people you love.
The picture that might feel familiar:
She has it all together on paper. But here's her actual day: feet hit the floor and she's already calculating what she'll eat. Planning breakfast in the shower. Thinking about lunch through her morning meetings. By evening she's exhausted — not from her job, not from her family, but from the constant mental chatter. Her husband asks about weekend plans and she's already spiraled into anxiety about restaurant menus.
If you know her — if she could be you — keep listening.
The question at the heart of this episode
If you had to estimate what percentage of your waking thoughts are consumed by food planning, food guilt, food anxiety, or food rules — what would it be?
For me, in the hardest seasons, it was 80–90% of my day. A constant conversation inside my own ears. And that sacrifice was costing me everything.
Which brings us to the quote that shifted everything:
"If you don't sacrifice for what you ultimately want, then you become the ultimate sacrifice."
What do you ultimately want? It's probably not to think about food all day. It's connection. Presence. Energy for what actually matters. Peace in your own mind. But when food perfection runs the show, you become the sacrifice — your time with your spouse, your conversations with your kids, your ability to be fully in your own life.
The 4 strategies to reclaim your presence
1. The Three-Second Check-InThroughout your day, pause and ask: "Where is my mind right now?" If you catch yourself in food thoughts during a conversation, a meeting, a moment that matters — don't judge it. Just notice it. Then ask: "What would it look like to be fully here right now?" Life goes on whether or not you participate in it. This tiny check-in brings you back.
2. The Energy AuditFor one day, keep track of how much mental energy goes to food thoughts. Every time you catch yourself planning, worrying, calculating, or obsessing — mark it in your notes app or on paper. At the end of the day, count it up. That's your energy audit: a real look at how much of your life force is being redirected away from what matters most. When you're on autopilot, you don't realize how time-consuming it is. This makes it visible.
3. The Presence PracticeNext time you sit down to eat — phone away, multitasking off — be fully there for the experience. Notice the taste, the texture, the satisfaction. This isn't about the food. It's about practicing presence, including presence with yourself. So often we eat standing, rushing, avoiding the experience entirely. Being present at your own table is where it starts.
4. The Connection RedirectWhen you catch yourself spiraling into food thoughts, immediately reach toward someone you love. Text your kid. Call your spouse. Hug your dog. The goal: redirect that mental energy toward connection instead of obsession. Try making dinner a device-free zone — and a free zone for your mind, too. Ask your people about their day. Really listen. (In Lindsey's family: "What was the most challenging part of your day, and what was the best part?" — it drives real conversation every time.)
What happens when you choose present over perfect:
Your relationships deepen — because you're actually there for them, not just physically
Your work improves — because you're not distracted by food anxiety
Your energy increases — because you're not exhausting yourself with mental food battles
And most importantly: you start to remember who you are — the woman with opinions about things other than calories, with dreams bigger than numbers, with love to give that was never contingent on eating perfectly
A few lines from the episode:
"Eating disorders aren't just about food. They're time thieves. They steal your presence from your own life."
"If you don't sacrifice for what you ultimately want, you become the ultimate sacrifice."
"Your kids don't need a perfect mom. Your spouse doesn't need a perfect partner. They need you present, engaged, and fully there."
"You're worth loving right now — food struggles and all. The people in your life are waiting for you to come back to them, not when you're perfect, but right now."
"You are not your thoughts about food. You are a woman with purpose, with love to give, and with a life that is happening right now while you're waiting to be perfect in it."
Your homework this week:
Choose one person in your life and commit to being fully present with them for 10 minutes. No phone. No mental planning. Just you, fully there.
Maybe it's morning coffee with your spouse. After-school time with your kid. A phone call with your mom.
Practice showing up completely — and practice letting food thoughts pass by like clouds in the sky while you stay anchored in the moment with someone you love.
Come be part of what's next!
💬 Join our private community at www.herbestselfsociety.com — a space where women are choosing present over perfect, every single day, together.
📧 Get on the email list at www.herbestself.co — Lindsey has a fun sprint offer and some incredible things coming, and email subscribers hear about everything first.
And if the food thoughts feel bigger than you can carry alone right now, reaching for specialized support is a brave, loving choice. I see you and I'm here for you!
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 
 

A listener wrote in recently and said the quiet part out loud — "I know I'm supposed to have this extra weight on - and I feel heathier, but it's so hard to keep eating when all I want to do is lose it. I've been cutting corners and I feel tempted to slip. How do I learn to be okay in this body and keep going?"
Sister, if that's you — this episode is for you.
Today Lindsey walks through the eight things she returns to again and again with the women she coaches — the shifts that help when your body feels foreign, when you're scared, when you don't know how to keep choosing recovery. Not quick fixes. Real ground to stand on while you find your way home to yourself.
The short version: do the next recovered you thing
Before the eight, the heart of it: just do the next recovered you thing. You don't have to figure out the whole road. You only have to take the next step the recovered version of you would take. Stop identifying with the older, smaller version of you — she wasn't your best self; she was you running on fumes. The body you're in now isn't your enemy. It's where the rest of your life gets to live.
8 things that help when your body doesn't feel like yours
1. Understand the recovery process.What you're going through is normal. Your body is healing, and healing isn't a sign you're doing it wrong — it's a sign you're doing it. Begin shifting your focus from how your body looks to how your body is healing. You're allowed to feel terrified and still take the next step. Both can be true.
2. Challenge the negative chatter.Acceptance starts with awareness. The harsh thoughts about your body? Those are symptoms of the disorder, not the truth. The mirror lies through that filter. Instead of trying to leap straight to loving how you look, aim first for respecting your body. That's the bridge.
3. Focus on body functions over body image.Your body is a vessel — it carries your soul through this life. As Glennon Doyle said: your body is not your masterpiece; your life is. Notice what your body lets you do. Appreciate it for showing up, even through the struggle. And as you move, shift from a metrics mindset to a mindful-movement one. No more exercising for numbers — movement for joy, for strength, for being alive in your skin.
4. Practice self-compassion.Speak to yourself like someone you love. Maybe write a letter to the younger version of you who started all this — apologize, tell her it's okay, let her know the wiser, stronger version of you is here now. You are a human. Struggling is part of being one. Feelings aren't facts — you're allowed to feel something hard without making it a verdict on who you are.
5. Keep making pro-recovery choices.Prioritize your meals. Prioritize your snacks. Prioritize sleep — seven to nine hours, because your body is doing real work and it needs rest to heal. Step off the metrics treadmill. Choose movement out of preference, not punishment. We're not playing small anymore.
6. Seek support.You can't do this alone, and you were never supposed to. Whether that's a coach, a therapist, a dietitian, or a community of women who get it — let people in. Vulnerability heals what isolation can't. Come hang out with us in the private community at HerBestSelfSociety.com, or reach out about working together one-on-one.
7. Practice patience and plan for the messy middle.Celebrate the small daily things — journaling, time off social media, sitting in nature, music, stillness. And plan for the hard moments before they hit. What are your triggers? Who are they? Where will you need boundaries? Planning is your friend. The messy middle is the hardest part — preparing for it makes it survivable.
8. Adopt the sunset mindset.Picture a sunset. We never look up and criticize one for being different than yesterday's — for the colors being "wrong," the shape being off. We just take in its beauty. Sunsets aren't criticized for their differences because their beauty doesn't need to be altered. Yours doesn't either. What would it be like to see your body the way you see a sunset — appreciation instead of judgment, beauty just because it exists? This planet isn't promised. Every day you have here is its own sunset. You don't have to love your body every day. But you can respect it, you can appreciate it, and you can let it be yours.
A few lines from the episode
"Just do the next recovered you thing."
"You're allowed to feel terrified and still take the next step."
"Your body is not your masterpiece. Your life is."
"Your body is a vessel — it carries your soul through this life."
"You don't have to love your body every day, and you're not going to. But you can respect it. You can appreciate it. You can let it be yours."
Your reflection this week
Pick one of the eight that speaks loudest to where you are right now and live in it for a few days. Don't try all eight at once. The shift back to feeling at home in your own skin isn't a checklist — it's a slow homecoming, one small choice at a time.
If it helps, journal these:
What is one thing my body did for me today that I didn't notice?
What would the recovered version of me do at my next meal?
Where can I trade judgment for appreciation today?
Come walk this with someone in your corner
You don't have to figure this out alone. If something in you just leaned forward — if you're tired of doing this by yourself and you want personalized support — come work with me one-on-one. You can fill out a client application at www.herbestself.co 
And big news — there's something exciting coming this fall that I've been building specifically for women who need support beyond one-on-one. Make sure you're on the email list at www.herbestself.co so you hear about it first.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

You're not at the beginning anymore. You know something has to change — and honestly, you've already started. But you're nowhere near the finish line either. You're just in it. The messy middle. Tired, unsure, not certain what your next step even is.
If that's where you are, this episode is a gentle hand on your shoulder. Lindsey shares the truth that reshaped how she sees recovery and coaching — the quality of your life is a reflection of the quality of the questions you ask yourself — and in today's episode she walks through four questions she recently sat with alongside the women in her support group program: the Recovery Collective.
Not questions that fix you. Questions that get to the root.
Why you feel stuck in the middle...
In the messy middle, we start asking ourselves the same draining questions on a loop: Why can't I get this right? What's wrong with me? Why am I still struggling?
Here's the thing — your mind answers whatever you ask it. Ask what's wrong with you, and it will go find evidence and hand you a list. That's not the truth; that's just your brain doing its job with a bad question. So sometimes being stuck isn't a sign you're failing. It's a sign you're asking questions that can only ever pull up weeds. The way through isn't a better answer. It's a better question.
The four questions (and why each one matters)....
What would you do if you couldn't fail?The messy middle is ruled by fear of failure — you hold back because what if it doesn't work? Take failure off the table, even just in your imagination, and your real desire floats to the surface. Your honest answer is a clue. It points straight at the step you've been afraid to take.
How are you, really?That one word — really — changes everything. You're so practiced at "I'm fine" you can say it in your sleep. In the middle, we numb out and stop checking in because we're afraid of what we'll find. This question is an invitation to tell yourself the truth, even if you're the only one listening.
Why are you worth knowing?Not what you do. Not what you accomplish, provide, or hold together — why you, underneath all of it, are worth knowing. This is the one that undoes people, because so many women have been valued for their output for so long they've forgotten they're worth knowing just as they are. Learning to finish the sentence "I'm worth knowing because…" is some of the most important work there is.
What does freedom mean to you?Not freedom in the abstract — yours. You can't walk toward something you can't picture. For one woman it's a quiet mind. For another, being fully present at her kid's party. For another, peace at the table. Naming yours, specifically, turns freedom from a someday fantasy into a real destination you can start moving toward.
What these four have in common....
Notice that not one of them is about fixing you. Not one is a rule or a behavior. They go underneath all of that — to desire, honesty, worth, and vision. That's the difference between pulling a weed and getting to the root. And it's the heart of why being coached, and being held by other women, can move you further in one honest night than months of white-knuckling alone. A good question, asked by someone who cares, changes things.
A few lines from the episode
"The quality of your life is a reflection of the quality of the questions you ask yourself."
"Your brain will answer whatever you ask it. Ask what's wrong with you, and it hands you a list."
"The way out of the messy middle isn't a better answer. It's a better question."
"You are worth knowing — just as you are."
"The messy middle isn't where you're stuck. It's where you're becoming."
Your reflection this week:
Take the four into the middle with you. Don't rush them — let them work on you over a few days:
What would you do if you couldn't fail?
How are you, really?
Why are you worth knowing?
What does freedom mean to you?
If it helps, journal one each day and notice what surfaces. The point isn't a tidy answer. It's the honesty the question pulls up.
Come be held in the Recovery Collective!!
Every other Wednesday night, a circle of women gathers in the space Lindsey holds — and they go to the root together. They ask the brave questions, sit in the real answers, carry them between sessions, and carry each other through the messy middle. If you're tired of doing this alone and something in you just leaned forward, there's a seat here for you. Find everything at www.herbestself.co/recoverycollective 
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Yesterday my heart broke a little — and then my son handed me a piece of wisdom I'm still carrying.
He'd worked so hard for a spot on a travel baseball team. He was sure he had it. And then the no came, and I watched my 12-year old question his worth in a way I know all too well. But after all the tears and the what-ifs were out, he looked at me and said something I'll never forget.
This episode is about the two choices life hands every one of us, every single day: to see problems, or to see possibilities. Because the difference between a heavy heart and a peaceful one is almost never the circumstance. It's the looking glass.
If you've ever stood in front of a closed door and heard maybe I'm just not enough — this one's for you.
What this episode is really about
The moment my son felt "not good enough" — and the surprising thing he understood
Why feeling your hard feelings first is part of the healing, not a detour around it
The two looking glasses: problems or possibilities, fear or faith, complaining or gratitude
How the same closed door can mean "something's wrong with me" or "something's being protected in me"
Why your worth was never up for the team, the number, or anyone's yes
A few lines from the episode
"You are chosen. You are loved. And I know this is hard."
"Mom… God must have been protecting me from something He knows that I don't."
"The difference between a heavy heart and a peaceful one is perspective."
"Same event. Two completely different lives lived from it."
"The closed door doesn't always mean something is wrong with you. Sometimes it means something is being protected for you."
A gentle invitation
If you're in a season where every looking glass seems to show you a problem — where you can't quite find the possibility on your own — you don't have to find it alone. That's what walking with someone is for. You can find me and the ways we can work together at www.herbestself.co, and come be held by the women in our community at www.herbestselfsociety.com. 
Your next steps:
👥 The Recovery Collective: Join women who are saying "no more" to eating disorders controlling their lives—group support with women who understand
www.herbestself.co/recoverycollective 
👤 1:1 Coaching: Fast-track your "no more" journey with personalized support for women ready to reclaim their lives
www.herbestself.co 
👉 Apply to work together
You don't need more time, readiness, or perfect conditions. You need to channel that same energy you use to run your life into reclaiming your life.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.