Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol | Eating Disorder Recovery Podcast — Less Food Noise. More Life.

Sis, I want to talk to the YOU today - the woman listening who is exhausted. Exhausted from restricting. Exhausted from punishing yourself with endless workouts and never taking a day off. Exhausted from trying to shrink yourself while showing up as the leader in every other area of your life.
You have it all together on the outside — you lead teams, manage budgets, raise humans, keep the whole household running. But when it comes to your body, you still feel like that confused little girl who learned her worth was tied to her size. That's the battle no one sees. And today, we're bringing it into the light.
By the end of our time together, you'll understand how your body story got written — and you'll have a framework to start rewriting it, from shame to self-compassion.
You didn't start out hating your body
Here's the truth I need you to hear: you learned to.
You didn't come into this world at war with yourself. Somewhere along the way — maybe at seven, watching your mom criticize her thighs in the mirror; maybe at ten, when someone commented on your changing body; maybe at thirteen, when the magazines promised happiness if you just looked a little different — you were taught that your body was a problem to be solved.
You learned it from a culture that profits from your insecurity. From diet companies making billions convincing you your body is wrong. From a fitness industry that sold you the lie that more exercise equals more worth. Nothing was ever actually broken, sis. You were taught a story. And what was taught can be rewritten.
The messages that built your prison
These are the "body story" messages so many high-achieving women carry — see which ones you recognize:
"Good girls don't take up too much space." You learned to make yourself smaller, literally and figuratively.
"Your body is your responsibility to control." Enough willpower, enough discipline — and your body became a project instead of your home.
"Thin equals healthy, healthy equals worthy, big equals bad." You learned the scale measures your value as a person.
"Successful women have it all together — including their bodies." So controlling your body became one more item on the success checklist.
"Your body exists to look good for other people." You learned to see yourself through everyone's eyes but your own.
These messages worked. They kept you small, compliant, and constantly striving. And that same control that felt like freedom was actually building your prison — brick by brick, year by year.
What this story has cost you
Your energy — all the mental space spent calculating, planning, and worrying, that could have gone to your dreams and relationships.
Your presence — the family moments missed, the social events avoided, the opportunities declined while you waited to "feel better" in your body.
Your authentic self — the woman you are when you're not worried about food or exercise. She's creative, brave, vibrant, and magnetic — and she's been buried under years of body shame and food rules.
Your physical health — the chronic restriction and over-exercising you think is keeping you "healthy" is actually putting real stress on your body.
You have the power to rewrite it
You're not that young girl anymore. You're a powerful, strong woman with wisdom and experience — and now you have a choice to choose differently. It starts with one decision, one meal, one moment of self-compassion over self-criticism.
Your body story doesn't have to end with restriction and exhaustion. The best chapters are yet to come.
A few lines from the episode
"You didn't start out hating your body, sis. You learned to."
"You learned from a culture that literally profits from your insecurity."
"Your body became a project instead of your home."
"That same control that felt like freedom was building your prison, brick by brick."
"The woman you are when you're not worried about food or exercise? She is magnetic."
"You're not too much. You're not too little. You're exactly enough, exactly as you are. It's okay to take up space."
Your body story rewrite — try this week
In the morning, before you critique anything in the mirror, thank your body for one thing it did for you yesterday — walked you through a long day, hugged your kids, kept your heart beating while you slept.
Before you eat, ask: "What would really feel good and nourishing right now?" Trust that your body has wisdom you've been drowning out with food rules.
Choose movement based on what feels good — a walk, yoga, stretching — not on calories to burn.
When you catch the harsh self-talk, speak kindness instead. Kindness builds body trust.
And journal on this: Who influenced my body story? When do I first remember believing these things? How can I rewrite it so I can stand in my truth and crush the next chapter?
You don't have to rewrite it alone
If you're ready to stop living as the perfect leader everywhere except in your relationship with your own body, I'd love to walk with you. My work isn't just about changing your relationship with food — it's about helping you discover who you are without the eating disorder in the driver's seat.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Something a little different today, friend — I'm sharing my guest conversation on the Her Healthy Body podcast with the sweetest mother-daughter duo, Coryn and Crysanne. We went right to the heart of it.
Here's the line they stopped to replay: if food is taking up so much space in your mind that it's stealing your presence from your life, that's not a weight problem — it's a worth problem.
Maybe you've never been diagnosed with an eating disorder. Maybe you don't think your relationship with food is "that bad." But if you're constantly thinking about what you can eat, whether you've earned dessert, or believing you'll finally be happy when the scale hits a certain number — this conversation is for you.
What we talked about
My story — from figure skating and "come back 10 pounds lighter" to anorexia, and the long road to real freedom
Why I never felt "ready" to recover — and how surrender, faith, and "doing the opposite" of what my mind said got me through
The worth problem behind the weight problem — what the scale can never give you
The deeper question underneath wanting to lose weight: what's actually driving the desire?
The GLP-1 conversation — and my honest concern about fear of eating and where this cultural moment is heading
Nourishing, honoring, and respecting your body as the starting place — not the reward
This conversation isn't about telling you not to pursue your health. It's about asking a deeper question: what's driving that desire? Because if we're chasing a number on the scale hoping it'll finally hand us peace, confidence, or worth — we're chasing something the scale was never able to give.
Your worth was settled before you ever stepped on a scale. That's the freedom underneath all of this.
A few lines from the episode:
"If food is stealing your presence from your life, that's not a weight problem — it's a worth problem."
"I never felt ready. I said, 'God, I'm scared to death, but I need you to save me from me.'"
"A lot of days, I just did the opposite of what my mind told me to do. That's how I got through."
"What started as trying to be healthier ended up controlling my life."
"No number on the scale can give you peace, confidence, or worth."
Huge thanks to Coryn and Crysanne for having me on Her Healthy Body — a podcast helping Christian women build a healthy lifestyle that actually lasts, from a place of faith instead of perfectionism. Go give them a follow and some love.
Ready to stop doing this alone?
If you saw yourself somewhere in this conversation, I'd be honored to walk with you.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

A woman in my community sent me a message this week that stopped me in my tracks: "Lindsey, do you ever have bad body image days? What does recovery actually look like years later? Do those old thoughts still creep in?"
Girlfriend, I had to sit with that one — because we don't talk about this enough. There's a myth floating around that recovery means you reach some magical finish line where body image struggles vanish forever. That is simply not true.
So today I'm pulling back the curtain completely and giving you my honest answer — plus the exact 8-step game plan I use when those old familiar feelings come knocking and I'm just feeling blah in my body. Grab your Target journal, friend. This one's a keeper.
The honest truth first
Yes — I still have days where I don't feel amazing in my body. Maybe I'm bloated, maybe I'm PMSing, maybe I caught myself in a dressing room mirror under those God-awful fluorescent lights, maybe I'm stressed in my business or walking through a hard season, and my body becomes the target for those feelings.
This is normal. And here's the difference. These moments used to consume entire weeks and months — sending me spiraling into restriction, over-exercise, avoidance. Now? They might last an hour, a moment, a day at most. Because I have a game plan that actually works.
Having these moments doesn't mean I'm not recovered. It means I'm human. Recovery isn't about never having a hard moment — it's about how quickly you return to love and gentleness with yourself when you do.
The 8-step game plan for bad body image days
1. Grace upon grace.Before anything else, give yourself permission to feel what you're feeling without judging the feeling. No more "I should be past this by now." Instead: "It's okay you're having this thought. You're human. This doesn't mean anything about your worth or your recovery." Talk to yourself the way you'd talk to your best friend.
2. Throw on the comfy, baggy clothes.Sounds simple — it's a game-changer. Soft jams, oversized shirt, cozy cardigan, hair in a bun. This isn't about hiding your body; it's about removing physical discomfort that amplifies emotional discomfort. Ditch the tight jeans. When you're not aware of how clothes are fitting, you can focus on how you actually feel instead of how you think you look.
3. Get to the root.Stop plucking weeds and expecting different results. Ask: "What's really going on here? What am I actually trying to control by focusing on my body?" Overwhelm? Anxiety about a relationship? Exhaustion? Nine times out of ten, the body image struggle is about something else entirely — and naming it lets you address the real issue instead of taking it out on your body.
4. Avoid the mirror for the rest of the day.If you're already in a critical headspace, why put yourself in front of a reflection you're only going to pick apart? No body checking, no seeking reassurance from a mirror. Body checking on a bad day is like picking at a wound and expecting it not to bleed. Catch yourself heading toward one? Turn around and find something else to do.
5. Honor yourself with mindful eating anyway.The voice might whisper "skip lunch" or "eat cleaner tomorrow." Don't. Eat normally, regularly, every few hours — foods that nourish and satisfy you. Don't punish your body for an emotional feeling. Those feelings will pass. They're not facts. Your body deserves consistent nourishment regardless of a temporary thought.
6. Notice exercise compulsions and pause.Here's a sneaky one — bad body image days can suddenly "motivate" you toward an intense new workout or extra cardio. Pause and ask: am I moving from love and energy, or trying to punish and change my body? If it's the latter, choose gentle movement — yoga, a walk in nature, stretching, or plain rest. You can sit with uncomfortable feelings without exercising them away.
7. No social media scrolling.Non-negotiable on a hard day. Stay off Instagram and any platform where you'll compare yourself or get hit with diet-culture messaging. Read a good book, call a friend, do something that fills you instead.
8. Reach for your people.This is the one that changes everything. I had a community of women who normalized these days and reminded me I wasn't alone — even when I thought I shouldn't still be having them. Recovery is so much sweeter when you're not doing it by yourself.
A few lines from the episode
"There's a myth that recovery means you never struggle again. That simply is not true."
"Having a bad body image day doesn't mean I'm not recovered. It means I'm human."
"Recovery isn't about never having a hard moment — it's about how quickly you return to gentleness with yourself."
"Those feelings will pass. They're not facts."
"We have to stop plucking the weeds and expecting different results."
"You can do hard things — including sitting with uncomfortable feelings without exercising them away."
"People who have recovered still struggle. They just keep showing up, choosing love over fear and grace over judgment."
Your reflection this week
Next time you're feeling blah in your body, don't reach for the old patterns. Reach for the game plan. Pick even one of the eight steps and practice it:
Give yourself grace upon grace
Put on the comfy clothes
Ask what you're really trying to control
Eat normally anyway
Reach for your people
You're doing the hard things just by showing up for yourself.
You don't have to do this alone
The single biggest thing that helped me on hard days was a community of women who understood — who normalized the messy moments and reminded me of my worth. That's exactly why I created the Recovery Collective: a space where women in every phase of recovery come together to share the real and vulnerable moments, celebrate the victories big and small, and support each other with tools and understanding.
Imagine having a safe place to say "I'm having a hard body day" and be met with understanding instead of judgment.
👥 Learn more and join the Recovery Collective → www.herbestself.co/recoverycollective 👤 One-on-one coaching → www.herbestself.co 💬 Private community → www.herbestselfsociety.com 
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Episode 300, sis! 🎉 I can hardly believe it — and I'm marking it with a message straight from my heart, plus a little personal news I can't wait to share with you inside.
If you've been telling yourself "I'll go all in on recovery when things calm down… when work slows… when the kids are older… when I finally feel ready" — this episode is your wake-up call and your permission slip, all in one.
Because here's the truth almost no one tells you: ready isn't coming. The calm season isn't on its way. And this fresh-start season is your invitation to stop waiting and take the next brave step — right in the middle of your beautifully full, messy life.
The lie that's keeping you stuck:
I'll start when I feel ready.
Sis, I need you to hear this from someone who just made a big, scary, wildly inconvenient decision in the messiest middle of her own full life: the perfect time is never coming. Readiness is a feeling, and feelings don't arrive on schedule. You don't wait to feel ready and then do the brave thing. You do the brave thing, and the readiness grows behind you.
You go all in inside the hard season — or it doesn't happen at all.
You are living under a ceiling the eating disorder built. The low, gray one that whispers this is as good as it gets for you. This is just who you are. Don't reach for more than survival.
That ceiling is a lie. And refusing to accept it — deciding I want more than this — is where your whole story turns.
Recovery isn't you pressing pause on your life to go fix yourself in a corner. It's the natural next step in becoming who you were made to be. And every chapter you've lived — even the hard ones, especially the hard ones — isn't wasted. It's woven in. It becomes your foundation.
Nothing you've been through is for nothing, sis. It's all preparation.
Here's what I ask of you every single week: picture your recovered self — present, free, quiet-minded, at peace in her own skin — and walk toward her before the whole path is visible.
You don't need the entire staircase. You just need the next stair, and the bet that she's real. Recovery is believing in a future you can't yet see and moving toward it anyway.
There's a reason we love this season — fresh starts, clean notebooks, the permission to begin again. And here's what I want you to know: you don't have to be a kid, or in a classroom, to get a first day. You can have one today.
Not a finished, perfectly-recovered woman someday. A brave, in-process one, now.
A few lines from the episode
"Ready isn't coming. The calm season isn't coming. You go all in inside the hard season, or it doesn't happen."
"Refusing the ceiling — that's where your whole story turns."
"Nothing you've been through is wasted. It's all woven in."
"You don't need the entire staircase. Just the next stair, and the bet that she's real."
"You don't have to be in a classroom to get a first day. You can have one today."
"I want this, AND I'm scared, AND I'm going anyway."
Your invitation this week:
Whatever your "fresh start" is — the brave recovery step you keep postponing until you feel ready — take one real move toward it this week. Not the whole staircase. Just the next stair.
Grab a fresh notebook if you need to. Write down the one small, brave thing. Then go do it — scared, imperfect, and anyway.
Ready to stop waiting alone?
If the step you're ready to take is finally letting someone walk this road with you, I would be so honored. That blend of lived experience and real coaching is exactly what I bring to the women in the Recovery Collective and in my one-on-one work — walking with you through this kind of brave, inconvenient, mid-season courage.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

The internet is buzzing right now about Ariana Grande — her stepping back from public life, and her message asking people to stop commenting on her body. And underneath this whole conversation is something every one of us needs to hear, because it goes straight to the heart of recovery.
Today, with a whole lot of grace, we're talking about the word "healthy" — and how it can become one of the most slippery slopes in all of recovery. I'm not here to speculate about anyone's private health (that's actually part of my point). I'm here to name the lie our culture keeps selling us: that thinner automatically means healthier. Sis, it doesn't — and the science agrees with me.
The part she got so right
For years, Ariana has asked people to stop commenting on her body, recently re-sharing that message as a "loving reminder." And she's right. There's a comfortability in our culture with narrating other people's bodies, faces, and weight — and it's dangerous for everyone.
We have to stop this. Stop the "did she lose weight," stop the "is she okay, she looks so thin." You never know who's in recovery. You never know whose daughter is listening. You never know what your words land on top of.
Where the fire got lit in me
Somewhere in this conversation came the idea that an older, fuller version of a body wasn't "the healthy one." That may be completely true for any given person — only they and their care team could know.
But that exact sentence — "my old body wasn't the healthy one" — is a sentence I told myself. It's one I've heard from a hundred women in this community. And it's one of the most slippery sentences in recovery, because the eating disorder is a master at wearing the costume of wellness. It doesn't say "let's be destructive." It says "let's just be healthy, let's just be clean, let's just be disciplined."
When "healthy" is actually the disorder talking
Let me be clear, because I lived it:
Eating very little and calling it clean
Only eating foods with five ingredients or less and calling it healthy
Cutting whole food groups and calling it a lifestyle
Being so consumed by "wellness" that you can't sit at the family table, can't travel without a plan, can't be spontaneous, can't live
That is not health. That's a disorder in a wellness costume.
And the hardest part? When you're in it, you believe your own lie. For a long time I fully believed I was just "making healthy choices." It felt like virtue. It felt like discipline. That's what makes the distortion so dangerous — from the inside, it feels like truth.
The lie our culture keeps selling
We're in a moment where thinness is loudly celebrated again — and our teens, our tweens, the young women who idolize who they follow are absorbing the message that thinner automatically equals healthier and better.
The science says otherwise. In the large studies on weight and mortality, being underweight carries a significantly elevated risk of death — roughly one and a half times higher in many studies, and several times higher in some populations. Meanwhile, the category our culture panics about — "overweight" (a BMI of 25–30, without obesity) — is consistently not linked to higher mortality, and in a number of large studies is associated with slightly lower risk than "normal" weight.
Let that land. The body our culture tells you to fear is often not the dangerous one. The body our culture applauds can be hiding real danger. Thin is not a synonym for healthy. It never was.
We also don't get to pretend we see nothing
Here's the nuance, held with honesty: "stop commenting on bodies" is true — and love sometimes notices.
When people express genuine concern for someone they can see is struggling, that isn't always cruelty. Sometimes it's the same instinct that makes a mother knock on a door. The problem isn't caring — it's consuming: the speculation, the spectacle, strangers turning a real person into content.
So here's the line: we don't get to narrate, diagnose, or gossip about anyone's body. But those of us who love someone up close, in the flesh? We can gently, privately say "I love you, and I'm here." That's not commenting on a body. That's loving a person.
You are not your body
If you take one thing from today: your body is the least interesting thing about you.
You are your kindness. Your humor. Your faith. The way you love your people. The dreams only you carry. The calling on your one and only life. The fact that our whole culture talks about a brilliant artist's body instead of her art is exactly the sickness we're naming. You were never meant to be scrutinized as a body — you were meant to be known as a soul.
A few lines from the episode
"The eating disorder is a master at wearing the costume of wellness."
"That is not health. That's a disorder in a wellness costume."
"When you're in it, you believe your own lie. From the inside, the distortion feels like truth."
"Thin is not a synonym for healthy. It never was."
"The problem isn't caring — it's consuming."
"Your body is the least interesting thing about you."
Your invitation this week
One: Catch yourself before you comment on any body — anyone's, including your own. Notice it, and choose not to. Starve the habit.
Two: Question the word "healthy" every time it shows up in your head this week. Ask honestly: Is this actually health — or the disorder wearing health's clothes? Would this choice let me live my life, or does it shrink it? That one question is a powerful flashlight.
Ready to stop doing this alone?
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

We talk all the time about the fear of failing in recovery. But today I want to name the fear almost no one says out loud — the fear of actually succeeding.
What if I do recover? Then what? Who am I without this? What would my life even become?
Sis, that quiet terror is one of the biggest reasons high-achieving women stall out in recovery and never quite go all in. So today, on the heels of a reflective walk, we're talking about perfection, success, surrender — and a completely different way to measure whether you're "winning" at this.
My biggest struggle in recovery
Wanting it to be perfect. Flawless. Honestly? That perfectionism is what entrenched me in the eating disorder in the first place.
Before I ever started recovering, I stayed in denial even longer because it felt safer — I couldn't fail if I stayed stuck. Then once I started the work, the story just shifted from "I'll be like this forever" to "I should be further along by now."
And underneath both was fear. Not just the fear that I'd never get better — but the fear of the opposite. What would it mean for my life if I actually succeeded at this whole recovery thing?
That's the question I want to ask you: what would it mean for your life if you quit playing small? If you fully surrendered to the process — knowing it doesn't have to be perfect, because you are perfectly flawed?
The two sides of the same coin
Fear of failure: What if I don't recover? What if this is just who I am? → leads to doubt and discouragement.
Fear of success: What if I do recover? Then what? → the fear nobody names, and often the one keeping you stuck.
Both are cultivated in control and in fear. And that very thing controlling you is exactly what you have to release to gain real freedom.
Redefining success
Society hands us a definition of success built on achievements, status, appearance, financial worth, influence — scroll Instagram and you'll feel it instantly. But I want you to shift the whole frame:
From what you accomplish → to who you become in the process.
Success does not equal full recovery.
Success does not mean you checked every box today or "were good."
Success equals becoming your best self. That simple.
Constant growth leads to contentment — and that's the success you're actually after. So ask yourself: if I'm putting one foot in front of the other, growing my character, softening old behaviors… isn't that success?
There's no gold medal for healing
Here's the humbling, freeing truth: there's no PhD for recovery. No gold medal. Nobody's clapping (well — maybe your people, and your coach who sees how far you've come). You don't heal "better" than anyone else.
It's the daily choices you make when no one is watching that lead to your success. It's not shiny. It's not applauded. It's yours.
So if you say you want freedom — what are you actually doing to reach for it? Are you feeding the lie that it's just not available to you? Or are you making the quiet, unglamorous, pro-recovery choice again today?
The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake
You can't learn a thing from being perfect. It's your failures, your hard days, your challenges that hand you the momentum to bounce back.
A client came to me this week and said, "Yesterday was awful. I didn't show up for myself. I let the disorder take over." And I asked her: "Do you want me to sit in that pity party and tell you how bad you were? Or do you want me to ask — where do we go from here? What's next?"
She said, "You're right. I just need to put this down and start over. Tomorrow's a new day." The more you surrender and let be, the higher you rise. You weren't called to be perfect. You were called to be better. Let God be perfect — you're allowed to be perfectly flawed.
The power of surrender
The thing that's controlling you is the very thing you have to release to gain real freedom. Research on surrender in recovery has suggested that people who let go — who anchor their trust in something bigger than their own control — experience greater personal empowerment, more happiness, and stronger recovery outcomes.
Courage, acceptance, and trust are required in recovery. So check where your trust is anchored. Is it in you being perfect? In checking every box? In getting it all exactly right today? That's the grip we have to loosen.
A few lines from the episode
"I couldn't fail if I stayed stuck."
"Shift from defining success by what you accomplish to who you become in the process."
"Success doesn't equal full recovery. Success equals becoming your best self."
"There's no PhD for healing. It's the choices you make when no one is watching."
"The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake — you can't learn anything from being perfect."
"You weren't called to be perfect. You were called to be better. Let God be perfect."
"The more you surrender and let be, the higher you rise."
Your reflection this week
What does success actually look like for you in recovery? Not materially — in character, in growth, in who you're becoming.
Where do you spend your time and energy — inner-focused on becoming better, or outer-focused on looking better?
What would it mean for your life if you succeeded? Sit with that one. It's often where the real fear hides.
Where is your trust anchored — in your own perfection, or in something bigger than you?
Measure the small wins this week, sis. That's the whole game.
Ready for support?
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

We just got back from a few days at the lake, and I came home with something on my heart I have to share with you — especially if you're the woman who has already tried.
You've done the therapy. Maybe more than once. You've read the books, listened to the podcasts, worked the treatment programs. And you're still here, still struggling, carrying a specific kind of heavy: "If I've done all this… why am I not better yet? What's wrong with me?"
Sis, nothing is wrong with you. And in today's quiet, reflective episode, I want to hand you the truth that surfaced for me in the stillness by the water — the one that sets that shame down for good.
For years, I did not know how to pause. Before recovery, I was going, and going, and going — always chasing the next destination, the next thing to control. And if I'm honest, I dragged that same energy into recovery. Even healing became a race. Am I there yet? Am I better yet? What's the next box to check?
Here's what the lake taught me: you cannot expect to know your right next step if you're unwilling to sit in the pause. The answer doesn't come in the sprint. It comes in the stillness.
The quote that undid me:
"You must forgive yourself for not knowing earlier what only time could teach."
If you're the woman who's tried everything — including therapy — you're carrying so much shame that it didn't "work" yet. I did the hard thing. I showed up. Why am I still struggling?
But hear me: your attempts were not failures. Some things can only be understood after — after you grow, after you go through it, after time quietly teaches you what you simply couldn't have known before. Every round of trying wasn't wasted time. It was the living that was growing the truth in you. You weren't behind. You weren't failing. You were becoming.
I'm a woman of faith, and I believe stillness is where God finally gets a word in edgewise. But the science backs it up, too.
When you're in constant motion, your nervous system lives in fight-or-flight — and a body stuck in stress doesn't heal well or think clearly. The part of your brain that figures out your "next right step" actually dims under chronic stress. So of course the answer won't come while you're sprinting.
Here's the study that convinced me: researchers ran a huge experiment — over 2,000 people across 37 sites, and these weren't monks, they were total beginners — compared against people doing another calm activity (listening to stories). They found that even a single mindfulness exercise, done one time, measurably lowered stress. Not after ten years. One pause. One time. As a beginner.
You don't have to be good at this, sis. And it compounds: in a separate ten-week program, more than 8 in 10 people showed a real drop in stress by the end. (Fun note — globally, women are nearly twice as likely as men to reach for this kind of stillness. We already know we need it.)
The going-going-going isn't just wearing you out. It's keeping the wisest part of you switched off. The pause turns her back on.
The proof, sitting at a lake:
Here's the part that made me teary in my chair by the water. I looked at my life on this trip and realized I was living the exact thing I never believed was possible for me.
I ate normally. With other people. I planned meals with my family every night and had what was served. I didn't panic, didn't calculate, didn't restrict the day before or promise to "make up for it" after. I sat at a lake, in my body, and felt not one second of unease. Not one flicker of regret about my weight. I was just there — present with my people, at peace in my skin.
Ten years ago I'd have sworn that woman wasn't in me. But she was. The whole time. I just hadn't yet lived the years that would grow her.
And if she was in me, sis — she is in you.
A few lines from the episode
"You must forgive yourself for not knowing earlier what only time could teach."
"Your attempts weren't wasted time. They were the living that grew the truth in you."
"You weren't behind. You weren't failing. You were becoming."
"The pause isn't lazy. The silence isn't wasted time. It's where the knowing lives."
"Even one small moment of stillness moves the needle. You don't have to be good at it. You just have to begin."
"You are not behind. You are right on time."
Find your own version of the lake. It doesn't have to be a trip — it can be ten minutes in your car before you walk inside, a morning coffee with no phone, a walk with no podcast (even mine). Just you, the pause, and the silence. Remember, the research says even one small moment counts. You don't have to be good at it. You just have to begin.
And while you're there, say this out loud if you can: "I forgive myself for not knowing earlier what only time could teach me."
Let that be enough for today.
If you're ready to stop sprinting alone - let's work together sis!
If part of what you're realizing in the stillness is that you don't want to keep doing this by yourself — that the thing that's been missing isn't more trying, but the right support walking beside you — I'd be honored to be that person.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Sis, today we're talking about escaping excessive exercise — because rest is required in recovery.
If you never miss a Monday… if you work out every single day… if you alter your vacations around getting a workout in… if you carry insane guilt and punish yourself later when you miss one… if you skip social plans to exercise, or your routine is affecting your marriage and your family… if you restrict your food on the days you move less —
this episode is yours.
I've been exactly where you are, and I'm proof you can lay this down. My clients are proof. And sis, you can be proof too.
Why this happens (and why it's not your fault)
This is so common for women struggling with disordered eating. Why? Because you've learned to cut corners. Cut calories. Take away. Survive on less in every way possible. You've manipulated your food to do it — and you've manipulated your body and your movement to do it, too.
I didn't start out working out twice a day. I didn't start out doing compulsive movements on my bedroom floor just to burn a little more. None of it happened overnight. The disorder built it over time while I ran on fumes.
I was a cardio queen who genuinely believed she loved that life. Letting it go was one of the hardest parts of my recovery — and what saved me was discovering movement that had nothing to do with burning anything. Mindful meditation. Yoga. Experiencing my body for the first time without a calorie counter attached.
And I've watched a client go from 7 days a week at nearly two hours a day… to 3 days a week at 30 minutes. If that feels impossible to you right now, stay with me.
5 steps to release excessive exercise
1. Get real with your current routine.Write it out. How much, how often, how long? Then write out the feelings — what comes up when you don't get a workout in? What's the anxiety like around when you'll fit it in? What rises up in you at the mere suggestion of cutting back? Awareness has to come before change.
2. Understand the power of permission.You must grant yourself permission — with exercise and with food. So much of the panic around cutting back is really about permission you've never given yourself. What you give your mind power over is what will have power over you. Voice the permission out loud: "I've run my body ragged for years, and I can choose to live differently."
3. Picture your future recovered self.How much does she exercise? Does she really want to be on a treadmill every single day — or is she at brunch with her family? For me, the honest answer was: I want to meditate. I want yoga. I want to relax. Some days I want to do nothing at all. Ask yourself honestly: is my current routine enjoyable, or is it an obligation driven by fear? (And be ready — there's an identity shift in this one. "I'm just someone who loves the gym" was a badge of honor for me until I got honest about it.)
4. Pick one tangible, small goal.Get off the treadmill five minutes early. Replace Monday's workout with journal time. Then actually put your rest days on the calendar — society tells you to pen in your gym time, so do the reverse and pen in your rest. Planning in advance sets positive intent, which builds momentum, which gets you the result.
5. Progress, not perfection.If you decide in advance to rest and then catch yourself scheming a workout anyway — that's not failure, sis. That's awareness. That's growth. You're going against diet culture and beliefs you've held as truth for years. Give yourself grace.
It's okay to not work out today
It's okay to rest if…
Your body is telling you to slow down
You're trying something new with your time
Life is overrun with work, family, and obligations
You're sick
You're not nourishing your body enough
You're hurting or injured
You're struggling with body image today
You're making time to fill your own cup or chase a dream
True happiness is making peace with what's no longer serving you — and creating a healthier version of it.
A few lines from the episode
"Rest is required in recovery. It's a non-negotiable."
"What you give your mind power over is what will have power over you."
"None of it happened overnight — the disorder built it over time while I ran on fumes."
"This workout isn't going to matter in five years. It isn't going to matter in two weeks."
"That's not failure — that's growth, awareness, evolving, learning."
"If you're listening to me right now on the treadmill… get off of it. This is your permission."
Your permission slip this week
Choose the days you're not going to work out — and put them on the calendar like an appointment. Then pick something purposeful to fill that time: a coffee date with someone you love, a phone call, a journal session, or absolutely nothing at all.
There's no right or wrong way to do this. Gradual works. Cold turkey works. What matters is honoring yourself and your body.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
 

On the pod today, we're discussing a question from a sweet listener who wrote in and asked:
"I know in order to find peace with food and fully embrace recovery, I must increase my food intake and my portion sizes. However, I'm truly anxious and scared every time I think about this. How do I stick with it and make it a habit that builds momentum?"
Sis, I adore this question — because I have been right there. If you're terrified to even think about increasing your portions, or you feel like you're already at capacity, I want you to know: you are right where you need to be listening to today's episode.
It's okay to be afraid — you're about to do something brave
We've been programmed by a culture where less is more. Dressing on the side. Don't drink your calories. You don't need those carbs. Everything is elimination, elimination, elimination.
So of course it feels scary to go the other direction. When my dietitian first handed me my meal plan, I looked at it and thought, there is no way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks. Every fear flooded in.
But here's the truth: it's okay to be afraid, because you're about to do something that is going to bring you future joy. This takes courage. And your future self is looking back at the you sitting here right now saying, "Yes, girl. You're going to rock this recovery thing."
Step 1: Understand your resistance
When you think about adding more to your day, what actually comes up? Fear of weight gain? Anxiety that you'll lose control and never stop? A flood of old rules — when would I fit that in, what would I choose, I can't have this if I have that?
That's just your brain spinning. See yourself in that place without judgment — because the resistance shows up precisely when you're about to embark on something amazing. It's okay to be scared and still do the dang thing.
Fear is what keeps the cycle going: heaviness → restriction → overwhelm → shame → right back where you started. The way out is building new dominant pathways in your mind — and that starts with what you practice on repeat.
Step 2: Know the truth about nourishment
Don't just tolerate the idea that eating more is "better" — coach yourself on why. Adequate nutrition supports healing for your organs, your muscles, your skin, your hair. It fuels the basics — breathing, circulation, digestion. It regulates hormones that directly impact your mood and health. It armors up your immune system and protects your bones for the long haul.
This isn't about shame for lost time, sis. It's about the reframe: "This is what I'm doing for my future self, because my body deserves this level of healing."
And swap the mindset: instead of more food = weight gain, try "I'm finally supporting my body's natural regulation. My body is learning to trust me, and I'm learning to trust it." Food is medicine. It's a non-negotiable — stop making it optional.
Step 3: Practical ways to gently increase
Work with a dietitian. I'll say it plainly: I'm a certified health coach, not a dietitian — and the single best move for portions and meal planning is a professional who specializes in this. They can help with visual aids, adequate-meal guidance, and the "plate distortion" that makes it hard to even know what a normal portion looks like. If you don't have one yet, finding one is worth it.
Go gradual and small. Don't overhaul every meal at once. Pick one small, consistent addition and honor it — then build week after week. Small steps compound.
Make it a game. Can I add a little more of this? A little something extra there? Each tiny win proves to your mind that you're capable — and that empowered feeling builds real momentum.
Add variety. If your meals or meal times are rigid, gently challenge it. Try a different lunch. Add something new in a gap in your day. What's one thing you could commit to this week?
Create a mindful eating environment. Eat where you feel safe, supported, and connected — not rushed, watched, or on the go. Set healthy boundaries where you need them.
Get accountability. Tell a loved one your plan for tonight and ask them to hold you to it. Or let someone you trust support you at mealtimes. This is also exactly what a coach is for.
A few lines from the episode
"It's okay to be afraid, because you're about to do something that is going to bring you future joy."
"Fear will keep you stuck in the cycle. Courage — small, gradual courage — breaks it."
"My body is learning to trust me, and I'm learning to trust it."
"Food is medicine. Stop making it optional."
"It's okay to not be feeling it — and it's still okay to do it."
Your one thing this week
Decide on your increase. Ask yourself: "What is the one thing I'm going to choose that will prove to myself that I'm capable?" Then go do it — gradually, small, and committed. Ask "how can I care for my body today?" and follow through.
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Today's episode is about one word, sis. One tiny, three-letter word that is quietly deciding the direction of your entire recovery — and honestly, your entire life.
"I want freedom, BUT I'm terrified." "I want to recover, BUT I've tried everything." "I want peace with food, BUT I don't trust myself."
Sound familiar? That little word BUT is doing more damage than you realize — and today I'm handing you the one-word swap that changes everything. Grab your Tarjay journal, girl. This one's a game changer.
BUT is a fixed mind
Here's what the word BUT actually does: it erases everything that came before it.
"I want freedom, BUT I'm scared." Do you hear it? The want just got deleted. The fear got the final word. BUT is a full stop dressed up as a sentence — it takes your desire and slams the door on it.
BUT is the fixed mind talking. It says these two things can't exist together: if I'm scared, I can't move. If I've struggled before, I can't succeed now. If it's hard, it must not be for me.
I lived in BUT for years. I want to get better, BUT this is just who I am. Every BUT was a brick in the wall between me and my freedom.
AND is a growth mind
Now watch what happens with one swap: "I want freedom, AND I'm scared."
Both things get to be true. The fear doesn't erase the want. The want doesn't require the fear to disappear first. They walk together.
AND is the growth mind: I can be terrified AND take the next step. I can have doubts AND keep going. I can have a history of struggle AND a future of freedom.
This is how courageous women actually move — not by waiting for the fear to leave, but by letting the fear ride in the backseat while the want drives. Not one woman who ever got free stopped being scared first. They just stopped letting BUT have the last word.
You can't choose both — choose one
Coach Lindsey coming in hot, because I love you too much not to: you cannot live in BUT and AND at the same time. One kills the want; one carries it.
So the next level of your life — the recovered you, the free you, the fully-present-at-the-dinner-table you — is asking you one question: what does this next level require from me?
It starts here: choose your word. BUT or AND. Fixed or growth. The wall or the door. You're already choosing one, a hundred times a day, in the tiny sentences inside your head. Today, choose it on purpose.
The longest walk you'll ever take
My business mentor and coach James Wedmore says something that has never left me:
"The greatest distance we will ever walk is between our head and our heart."
And whew — is that the truth in recovery. Because your head already knows. You've listened to the podcasts, read the books — you could teach a class on what recovery requires. Knowledge isn't your problem, sis.
The walk is from knowing it up here… to believing it in here. From "recovery is possible" as information to "recovery is possible FOR ME" as truth.
And what carries you on that walk isn't more information — it's AND. Every time you say "I'm scared AND I'm doing it anyway," you take one more step from your head toward your heart. Every meal chosen in fear, every rest taken in doubt, every hand raised for help before you feel ready — those are the footsteps. That's the walk.
Try it on
Take your sentence — you know the one — and swap the word:
"I want to be free, BUT I've had this for decades" → "I want to be free, AND I've had this for decades — so I know exactly how much this freedom is worth."
"I want to trust myself, BUT I've broken promises to myself before" → "I want to trust myself, AND I'm learning to keep promises to myself, one at a time."
Feel the difference? BUT ends the story. AND continues it. And sis — your story is not finished.
A few lines from the episode
"BUT is a full stop dressed up as a sentence."
"The fear doesn't erase the want. They walk together."
"Not one woman who ever got free stopped being scared first. She just stopped letting BUT have the last word."
"The greatest distance we will ever walk is between our head and our heart." — James Wedmore
"BUT is the wall. AND is the door."
"I want this, AND I'm scared, AND I'm going anyway."
Your homework this week
Catch your BUTs. Every time you hear one in your head — I want this, BUT… — pause and swap it out loud: I want this, AND.
Then take your biggest BUT sentence, write it in your journal, and rewrite it with AND. Watch what it opens.
'I want support, BUT…' — girl, swap it
"I want support, AND I'm scared, AND I'm reaching out anyway." That's the move. And that's exactly what we do together!
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.